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344 July 24 Tuesday - 8:45 P.M. My Dearest Darling: This has been a hard day for both your sweeties. Last night feeling very tired, and all tied up in knots inside, I decided to take a Seconal capsule and get a good nights sleep hoping to feel better. I hadn't been asleep very long, when Wendy woke up crying, and continued to go to sleep and wake up at intervals til ten this morning. Each time I had to get up, fighting that heavy, tired feeling til I thought I would lose my mind, or fall down in a heap. At one point [pg 2] I remember shaking Wendy, and then bursting into tears, because I felt so badly about it. I haven't any idea as to what was the matter with her, unless it was a tooth - but she hasn't had any trouble before. Today she's been fussy and cranky, but there doesn't seem to be anything wrong with her. She's probably reflecting my current mood, which I can't seem to shake, and is sleepy beside. This morning Grammy came over with some letters to be mailed, took one look at me, and hustled Wendy over to her house for the morning. That was a blessed relief, and I was able to go downtown and [pg 3] shop leisurely. This afternoon I was still too tired to go down to the beach, so we went out into the back yard. I washed and then dried my hair out there, while Wendy waddled about complaining. I think she was happiest when I put her into a pair of overalls and set her loose here in the living room for an hour before bedtime. Watching her is a full time job, and right now its beginning to get the better of me. If you were home you could fence in the backyard with chicken wire, and build a sandbox-perhaps find a place to hang the swing and sandpaper a packing box for a playhouse, and she’d have enough to amuse her in a safe place, but its [pg 4] too big a job for me, and I couldn't get anyone like Mr. Ricketson without have a steep bill. We'll make out some way, but I hope we don't have too many days like this one. All day I've been thinking that you had probably received all my letters and written one of your super-specials which would arrive tonight, but I got fooled. Helen on her way home from the beach brought me #'s 279 and 80 mailed on the 20th and 21st which means that now I probably won't get any more mail til Thursday. What do you suppose held up my mail to you - outgoing cargo? I don't know how I got so many letters ahead of you, except that I haven't missed a day, and [pg 5] occasionally have written two or three letters. Wendy half walks, half crawls up the stairs, but moves like a little streak of lightning- fanny bumping merrily from side to side. Alright sweety - a trip to Hawaii it shall be - I would like to see the place, but I’d still like to go to Alaska, and if we have a car it may be possible. Its nice of the Navy to instigate a point system, but it isn't going to help us any - damn it all - I feel trapped. To bed now after reading a bit more of Nora Waln's “The House of Axile” - a Chinese story. I love you darling, but I could show you and tell you better if you were home Bobby
