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201 March 21 - Wednesday - 8:00 P.M. My Darling: This is one of those nights where I’d either like to let off steam, or get a buzz on - I'm so damn sick and tired of people - or I should say the females that make up my circle of friends here - If I’d known that CASA and all its attachments were going to move nearby I certainly would have gone anyplace else to live. I know these are abnormal times, and everyone is edgy, but it sure brings out the lesser side of people. Right now, I’d like to be far away from everyone I know, and just be alone for awhile. Too much gossip, speculation etc. just puts me on the defensive. Helen was here this afternoon when Dana and Mike walked in - Dana's first question as usual was “Did you get any mail?” Helen said my face froze up immediately - even tho I could answer yes. Just [pg 2] little irritating things like that are beginning to wear me down til I feel downright nasty. It isn't right I know - and I suppose I should be cooperative and cast my lot in with the gabbling majority, but it just isn't in me. All this isn't worth getting het up about, and ordinarily I wouldn't blow up - this time its just a lot of little annoying things repeating each day - over and over- Wendy and I didn't do very much today - This morning I stopped at the lumber company to leave an order for a sturdy wooden box with hinged top. I'm going to paint it gray green outside and either white or pale pink gray on the inside. Til you get home I plan to use it to keep my new clothes in - Afterwards Wendy can have it for a toy chest - it will be heavy enough to ship toys or other things [pg 3] in later on. I tried first to find a discarded box in one of the stores here in Carmel, but boxes, especially good ones are scarce now. This afternoon we drove over to Monterey with Helen and Bobbie to do some shopping and pick up clothes that were ready at the cleaners. M and F sent us $10 for Easter. I bought Wendy an Easter bonnet - will use my share for the box, and the rest is going into a fund for our next phone call. Let's split the cost and talk about six minutes. Do you think we could? I do wish Wendy would laugh, giggle or make noises for you - but she is just as quiet as can be when the phone rings, and never makes a sound til I hang up. She's too big to cry, because she makes an awful lot of noise now. Maybe I can tickle her nose, and have her sneeze for you - Wouldn't it be wonderful if there was television - or would [pg 4] that be too hard to take - Gave Wendy her first cottage cheese for supper - wish you could have seen her - First she made a face - then looked at me as if to say “Mummy, what are you trying to put over on me?” She finally got it all down, with a double portion of apple sauce for a chaser- Disappointed in the enlargements - guess I won't bother any more - the contact prints are really much better - To bed now, and a sincere hope that I wake up feeling pleasanter tomorrow. Goodnight - my beloved - knowing that we’re always together means everything to me. I love you - Bobby
