Lititz Record

              ESSSSESKfiKSE^
Published Eyei-y Friday Morning liy j
J. FRANK BUCK.
0FFIOB—On Broad street, Liííts,
Lancaster Coanty, Fa,
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the KEOOKD for one year, for liis trouble- ' VOL. XIII LITITZ PA., FRIDAY MORNING, SEPTEMBER 27,1889. NO 4
Sates of Advertising in the Record.
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tlon, must be handed in, at the very latest. b|
Wednesday evening.
Job Work of all kinds neatly and promptly
executed at short notice.
All communications should be addressed to
EtECOBD OFFICE.
OUts, Lane. Co., Pa,
I I - -S
l i t jk
j , ? Outfitter.
CLOTHING.
I offer everything in the way of Fall
and Winter Clothing and make a specialty of
S I TO ORDER,
having an endless variety ol piece goods to
select from. In the
Ready-made Department
you will find an elegant variety of Men's,
Youths' and Children's Clothing, made up
in good style, warranted as represented or
no sale. Prices will be found as low as
anywhere.
HATS AND CAPS.
OQTnTiTi'Dt iTD'Q.
We have the latest and nobbiest styles
in Fine Stiff and Soft Hats for men and
boys. Caps for wear a specialty. No old
styles.
The most comfortable and neatest
Shirt is the Tailor Made Flannel Shirt.
I have them in all colors, in various patterns,
at prices far below last year's prices and in
such pretty designs that they will sell.
White Shirts, laundried and unlaundried,
the latter from 35 cents up. Who'd think
of making a shirt when they can be bought
at these prices ?
NECKWEAR.
Nothing adds so much to the appearance of a man
as a neat Collar and Necktie. I have the correct styles
in seasonable fall and winter shapes of fashionable
Scarfs and Ties, in large variety to select from. These
goods were made especially for me from silks of my
own choice. In COLLARS and CUFFS I can supply you
in linen, celluloid or paper, just as you prefer. In
styles it must be funny if I cannot suit you.
Would be pleased to have you call and see before going
elsewhere to purchase.
W A L T E R H. BUOH,
" R E C O R D " B U I L D I N G ,
J B J R O - A J D S T . , - L I T I T Z.
^Rothsville Carriage Factory.*»
A L L K I N B S O F
Buggies, Carriages, Phsetons,
p * Market Wagons
s»
on hand at lowest prices. Also a complete stock of SECOND HAND CONVEYANCES
TEIIY LOW. F. B. KOFROTH, Prop'r,
22-mar ROTHSVILLE, PA.
A. G. Killian's.
«FRESH FISH*
RECEIVED WEEKLY,
—AT THE—
l^eficai[QpefjIoiige
OYSTERS AND ORANGES
a specialty for the supply of hucksters.
S T O V E S I
A Large Lot o£
Heating Stoves,
which I will positively close out
BELOW COST
to reduce my big stock.
OIL CLOTH,
2 yards wide, at from 45 to 90 cents a yard.
Stovepipe and Stove Boards, Agate Ware,
Tubs and Buckets, Knives and Forks.
Roofing and Spouting, Plumbing, Steam
ftnd Gas Fitting, Wood and Iron Pumps.
Stoves put up and delivered iree of charge
All work guaranteed. Can compete ia price
With the lowest.
Come and see my stock. No trouble to
show Goods.
J. A. A
MAIN STREET, LITITZ, PA
HESS & BEAR,
« LOMBI DEALERS.
LITITZ, PA.
Coal and Lumber kent under Co\ er,
We make a specialty of LIME-BURNING
COAL, which is run over a screen and easily
loaded without extra charge.
We also sell Plastering Hair and Sand and
are agents for CROCKER'S HONEST PHOS-PHATE,
one of the best fertilizers in the
market for tobacco and wheat.
Prices Reasonable in Everything we
Sell. 16mar-ly
The Olli im
CONFECTIONERY,
MAIN STREET, LITITZ, PA.
Fresh Bread, Cakes, Buns, Holls, &c.,
daily.
Ice Cream, Fruits & Confectionery
furnished for picnics, parties, &c., at short
notice and at lowest rates.
I. F. BOMBERGER. Prop'r. 17my r
THE RECORD OFFICE DOES EVERY
kind of printing, from a card to a large
poster, in the neatest manner. Try us.
DR.COEX'S SANTONINE WORM SYRUP;
Is the most pleasant and certain Vermi-fuge
known to medical science. Try a bottle.
Price 25 cents. These Remedies are prepared
only at Dr. H. N. C'oxe's Laboratory, Schuyl-kill
Haven, Pa., and sold by all Respectable
Dealers' 28sep-Gm
HIRAM'S TWO WIVES.
A Case in Which a ïjook Should Have
I*receded the Tjcap.
F.ancis M. Livingston, in the Epoch.
Mr. Hiram Caldwailader ran light-ly
up the steps of his house in Wash-ington
square one afternoon in May.
A compactty-built little man of fortv-five
years, with a round smooth face
and a merry twinkle in his eye, he
looked fully ten years younger than
he was.
" Is Mrs. Oadwallader at home,
Nannie ?" he inquired of the trim
maid-servant iu the hall.
" No, sir ; she went out about two
o'clock."
" Are there any letters, Nannie ?"
" Yes, sir, in your room on the
dresser, sir."
" Thank you. Do you know where
Mrs. Oadwallader went ?"
" No, sir."
He ran upstairs, whistling an air
from " Barbe Bieu," and took up sev-eral
letters from the dresser. " Two
for Mrs. C.," he soliloquized ; " look
like bills ; here are some wedding
cards, Bennie De Forrest's I suppose,
and here is a letter from Cynthia.
What important communication, re-quiring
four cents postage, has she
now to make, I wonder."
He opened the letter and ran rapid-ly
through the first of the closely-written
sheets : . " Prevented from
writing lately on account of the plum-bago—-
may go the White mountains
this summer—poor Mr. Pettio, rector,
in trouble again—used incense East-er
morning—some busybody complain-ed
to the bishop—have been thinking
so much lately of poor, dear Helen."
(Here Mr. Oadwallader slightly knit
his brows.) " I can hardly believe
that it is fifteen years since—h'm—h'm
—do you - remember that little sole-leather
trunk of my father's which
Helen had after she married you ? I
came across it in the attic yesterday,
whore it is stored- with many other
relics of by gone happy days—"
" Oh, I thought so," groaned Mr.
Oadwallader. " Why is she forever
harping on the old relics of by-gone
days? Why can't people let such
things pass away with the by-gonè
days? Bah!"
He flung the letter impatiently from
him, and began walking up and down.
Mis Cyntnia Olds was the sister of
the first Mrs. Oadwallader. Mr.
Oadwallader was a model husband
during his first lifetime, and when she
died he mourned her sincerely for two
years, and then consoled himself with
a second wife. He never knew what
became of the effects of the first Mrs.
Oadwallader, and, without the slight-est
disrespect to her memory, he never
had taken the trouble to inquire. He
simply thought nothing about the
matter.
Mr. Oadwallader took up the letter
again and put it in hig pocket. " The
rest of this will keep for another
time," he muttered. " What's this ?"
as a folded bit of paper lying on the
dresser caught his eye. He opened it
and saw a few lines written in
pencil :
DEAREST HIRAM : •
I am not feeling quite well to-day,
and Mrs. Brown has persuaded me
that a little trip into the country
would do me good. She is going to
take me with her to Short Hills for
the day. She has an aunt, Mrs.
Widgeon, living there, and we will
stay to dinner. Could you come for
me this evening on the eight o'clock
train? With a hundred kisses.
YOUR LOVING WIFE.
P. S.—Mrs. Widgeon lives in a
large house near the station, and Mrs.
Brown says anybody can direct you.
" What does she mean by galloping
off to Jersey, I wonder, when the last
thing she said to me was not to forget
the Wheatleights' reception to-night.
' Not feeling, well !' She was the pic-ture
of health this morning. And
who is Mrs. Brown? There's some-thing
behind those thousand kisses ;
she is not ordinarily so lavish. I'm
glad to see she is paying some atten-tion
at last to what I have said to her
about her handwriting, and has drop-ped
that monstrous angular scrawl.
Yes, she is evidently making an effort
to please me. I wonder what it is she
wants. I'll have to go, of course."
(Mr. Oadwallader stood a little bit in
awe of his handsome wife.) I'll just
dress now and go and dine at thé
club."
Leaving the note from his wife on
the table, he proceeded to make his
toilet.
About nine o'clock a snug little
man, in a dress suit and light Over-coat,
alighted at the station in Short
Hills. He approached an old man
who stood on the platform with a
lantern, and asked to be directed to
the house of Mrs. Widgeon.
" What Mrs. Widgeon, sir?"
" I do not know. This lady lives in
a large house near the station, I am
told."
" There never was but one Mrs.
Widgeon in Short Hills that I ever
heard of, sir. That was old Widder
Widgeon; who's been dead nigh on
•to ten years. There's her house, sure
enough, that big one just beyond the
bend in the road. Her married
daughter lives there now. There's
nobody .else of that name here, unless
it's some of the summer boarders, and
it's a bit late for them."
" That's queer," murmured the
little man. " Well, that must be the
house. Thanks," said he, starting off
down the road.
Ten minutes later a lady, heavily
veiled, emerged from the gloom at the
other end oi the platform and ap-proached
the same old man.
" Can you direct me to the resi-dence
of Mrs. Widgeon ?" she asked,
in a mysterious Aoice.
" What another one?" chuckled the
old ttation master. "The widder
seems to be in demand to-night."
" Do you know, or do you not ?"
asked the lady sharply.
" Well ma'am, I reckon I know
as well as anybody else around these
parts. Many a day's work I've done
for the Widder Widgeon."
"It is a large house near the sta-tion,
is it not ? Which way am I to
go?"
"Yes—yes, that's just what the
gent said, but you'll find the party
as you're a lookin' for in a very small
house now, not more'n six by two, in
the cemetery just back ot the church
yonder."
"In the cemetery—at this hour!
Is—is any one with her ?"
" Yes, ma'am, the old man is right
alongside. They agree much better
there than they did in the flesh, when
they lived in the big house."
" The man is intoxicated," she mur-mured.
" No, Hiram has discovered
the loss of the note, and, thinking he
may be followed, has bribed this old
scroundrel to throw me off the track."
" I will find the place for myself,"
she said aloud, and walked rapidly
down the road."'
"Good luck to you, ma'am," the
old fellow called after her.
" Perfidious monster!" add Mrs.
Oadwallader to herself. " It was all
I could do to restrain myself from de-nouncing
him on the train. How
smiling and snug he looked ! Little
did he know who was so near him.
To think of my having been so de-ceived
in him all these years ! I won-der
who the creature is. Perhaps he
is really married to her, and I—oh,
horrible! This must be the place."
She entered the gate, and, hearing a
step on the walk, concealed herself
in the shrubbery.
Her husband was there.
>fc ^ ^ ^
The big house looked very dark to
Mr. Oadwallader as he walked up the
avenue of trees leading to it. He
rang the bells several times before a
head protuded from an upper window
and a female voice called : " Who's
there?"
" Is this Mrs. Widgeon's house?"he
asked.
" Yes—what do you want ?"
" Is the lady at home ?"
" Mrs. Widgeon is dead."
" Ah ! I beg pardon. Is—ah, Mrs.
Brown in ?"
" No, sir; she don't live here."
"Is Mrs. Oadwallader here ?"
" Who?"
" Mrs. Oadwallader."
" I don't know her." r
Mr. Oadwallader, was silent for a
moment. He was at a loss what to
say. The window closed with a bang.
" Humph! thats cool. Well, I've
done all I can. Henrietta will l ave
to get home now the best way she
can."
He pas&d down the walk.
"I wander if I ought to wait for
her," he said aloud. " Pshaw, no!
I'll go back to the station and inquire
if she had been seen. If I can't find
out anything here, I'll go back to
Philadelphia."
" Hiram !" a voice called softly.
" Eh—what's that ?"
A lady stepped out from the dark-ness
; her face was concealed by a
heavy veil.
" Oh, I was so afraid you weren't
coming," she said, in a whisper.
" Is that you, my dear ? What are
you doing out here—why aren't you
in the house?"
" I was so afraid."
" Afraid of what ?"
" Afraid we might be followed."
" Why, who would follow us ? Why
do you speak in that voice, and what
does that heavy veil mean ? Has
anything happened ?"
" Oh, I had a foolish fancy that you
night have dropped my note, and that
your—that somebody might find it
and discover us."
" Discover us ? Has she gone crazy
or have I?" Mr. Oadwallader mur-mured.
" Oh, Hiram, I have feared lately
that you were growing cold toward
me. When we can have done with
these secret meetings and I be ac-knowledged
publicly as your wife ?"
Mr. Oadwallader was now thorough-ly.
alarmed. He thought his wife was
out of her head, and that she had
wandered away from home in that
condition. He took her hand, and,
drawing her toward the gate, said
soothingly : " Come, my love, come
with me, and we will go home."
" And then you will not leave rrie
any more?"
" No, no ; I shall not leave you."
" Will your other wife come there ?"
"No, indeed; oh,, no," said Mr.
Oadwallader, willing to reassure her
by any means.
" You are really married to her,
are you, Hiram ?"
" Certainly not," lie replied, still
drawing her along.
" She only thinks so."
" Yes, she only thinks so," said the
unhappy man.
" Suppose she should appear here
now," said his companion, shrinking
" Come along dear, I shan't let any
one harm you."
" But what would you do ?" she
persisted.
" I'd drive her away."
"You would, would you," and with
a backward fling of the veil Mrs.
Oadwallader displayed her face, pale
with righteous indignation and drew
herself up to her full height. " Well,
sir, here she is !"
" Henrietfa, what does this mean?"
gasped her husband.
" It means, sir," she cried, " that
an injured wife has discovered your
villiany, that she has tracked you
here and heard your repudiation of
her from your own lips. Now drive
her away or strike her to the earth,
you are quite capable of it!",
" Henrietta, are you really mad, or
are you acting ?" he asked, angrily.
" Oh, no doubt you will say that I
am toad; possibly you might escape
justice through such a heinous charge
did I not hold the proof of your perr
•fidy in the paper written by thO woman
who calls herself your wife. Biga-mist
!"
"Bigamist? Henrietta, will you
stop your raving long enough to tell
me in as few words as possible just
what you are talking about?"
She held up a slip oi paper to
him. " Do you recognize this ? Do
not try to take it from me, or I shall
cry for help."
"How can I tell what it is in this
light, when you shake it under my
nose and then snatch it away ? It
looks like the note you wrote your-self
which brought me down here on
this fool's errand."
Mr. Oadwallader smiled with fine
sarcasm,
•' Oh, I wrote it myself, did I ? It
is so very like my hand. Oh, how
has such a clumsy deceiver contrived
to hide his true self from me during
all these years?"
"I confess the handwriting is bet-ter
than yours," cooly replied her hus-band,
who was now thoroughly angry;
"but I am not aware of any one else
who is privileged to sign herself in
that manner."
" Monster ! can you taunt me with
my handwriting at such a time ? Oh,
what a heart of stone you must have !"
Mrs. Oadwallader, noting the change
in her husband's mood, was about to
weep.
Henrietta, if, as you gently intimate,
you did not write me to meet you
here, some one has been playing a
practical joke on us. It will notfhelp
matters for us to stand here at bay at
one another on the highway of this
respectable village. I am going to
catch the next train back to Philadel^
phia. I advise you to come with me."
Mrs. Oadwallader felt that if she
did not comply he would walk off and
leave her standing there, which would
be a most undignified situation for
her.
" I will accompany you, sir, for the
sake of appearances," she said, " but
I lorbid you to speak to me."
Mr. Oadwallader obeyed her to the
letter. He lit a cigar, and Henrietta
walked by his side in dignified silence.
Arrived at the station he inquired
when the next, train left for Philadel-phia.
" In three-quarters of an hour, sir,"
replied the friend of the lantern.
" Did you find the widder, sir, or
ma'am?"
Without replying to the question
the husband and wife entered the
waiting-room. It was empty. How
could Mr. Oadwallader stand three-quarters
of an hour alone in the room
with that sphinx-like figure, who, he
felt, regarding him with reproachful
eyes from behind her veil ? If he
only had a newspaper. Stay, there
was Cynthia's letter, which he had
put in his pocket, thinking he might
read it on the train. He could con«
sume fifteen minutes over that. He
moved over to the other side of the
room under a lamp and took out the
letter. Henrietta sat motionless as be-fore.
Then for awhile there was no
sound but the rustling of the paper
as Mr. Oadwallader turned the pages
and the ticking of the clock.
A whistle from' her husband caused
Henrietta to start. He stood up and
came toward her. No, she would not
speak to him.
' My, dear he said, in a dry tone,
" I think that never before during the
eight years of our marriage have I had
occasion to remind you that you had a
predecessor. Though there is nothing
to regret in this fact, it is, I think,
deeply to be deplored that a sister of
my first wile still survives. Will you
kindly glance over this page of a letter
I received from Cynthia this after-noon
which I have read for the first
time this moment."
Henrietta thought to herself: " I
shall pay no attention to him." Then
she took up the letter. Mr. Oad-wallader
had opened it so that the
passage about the little sole leather
trunk was uppermost. Henrietta read:
While looking over some sacred me-mentoes
which had long been cherish-ed
there I found this note from dear
Helen to which I thought you ought
to have. I well remember the day
when she and Annie went down to
Short Hills. It was the very day old
Mr. Widgeon had his stroke of apo-plexy,
coming so sadly sudden as it
did. The two girls were there at the
time, and Helen returned shortly
after, and I remember hearing her
tell how Mrs. Widgeon carried on—
" Why. Hiram, then this note was
from—"
" Yes, this is the note Helen wrote
me at the time, though I don't re-member
a word about it. It must
have dropped out of Cynthia's letter."
" And to think of the base sus-picions
I harbored ! Hiram, I can
never forgive Cynthia Olds for this.
I believe she did it on puipose. I
can't tell you how I suffered since I
found that letter on you ratable."
" Don't wrong poor Cynthia, my
dear. I'm sure you must have been
very much upset to apply such epi-thets
to your husband as bigam—"
" Hush, hush ?" she said, soothing-ly,
laying her hand on his lips. " Oh,
Hiram, forgive me ! If I were sure
that nobody was looking, I'd—"
A Novel to Match Her Gown.
Please send me a summer novel in a
green cover.
The librarian of a circulating
library received the above request in
a note. It was brought in by a lady's
maid who waited to carry the book
home.
The librarian hunted this his sum-mer
novels and at last found one that
had a cool green color.
" That will do," he said, and wrap-ped
it up.
" How much ?" asked the maid,
producing her purse.
" Fifty cents, please," and he drop-ped
the money into the till.
" What was the title of the book ?
inquired a bystander.
" I haven't any idea," was the
honest answer. " She doesn't want a
book to read, but one to hold in her
hand and lie in her lap. I reckon it
was ' Married for fun,' or ' Loved and
lost,' or something of that sort. Any-how
the cover is all right.
Origin of Black Maria.
Way back in the twilight of the set-tlement
of Boston, Maria Lee, a color-ed
woman of gigantic stature, possess-ing
the courage of a lion, kept a
sailors' boarding-house down at the
old North End. One night a party
of drunken tars got into a row and
began throwing the Amazon's chat-ties
out of her house. The " watch "
was called in, but was soon over-powered,
and dismay spread abroad
through the street. Then Maria
stalked out of her habitation and stop-ped
further outrange by collaring two
of the leading offenders and carrying
them bodily up to the old "watch
house," then standing near where
Union Street now crosses Hanover
Street. " Black Maria " was known
throughout the city for her prodigious
strength, and for years she aided the
police in quelling rows, and had been
known to take three strong men to
the " watch house " at once, or one at
a time. So years afterward, when the
first police "cart" was made it was
called the " Black Maria "—hence the
Unwelcome Immigrants.
The permanent and ultimate success
of our method of government is not
yet conclusively established. As our
second century opens before us we see
many dangers looming into sight. A
republican form of rule is not a per-petual
motion machine only needing
to be well built, well oiled, and well
started, and then left to itself. On the
contrary, it is a living organism, need-ing
food and shelter, and capable of
growth, of increased vitality, of even
larger accomplishments, and capable
also of decline and of death. Any One
familiar with the history of our own
time can call to mind without, effort
many of the besetting dangers that
must be warded off if the United
States are to hold their own through
the twentieth century.
One of these perils rises to view
when we learn that since 1860 there
have come to our shores 10,000,000
immigrants ; that at present they are
coming at the rate of 500,000 a year ;
and that the number for a single year
has risen as high as 800,000. There
were two years in succession in which
Germany alone sent us a total of
460,000, From Russia and from
Austro-Hungary, come from 40,000 to
80,000 annually, and from Italy more
than 50,000.
Now it is not to be denied that
many—very many—of these immi-grants
make excellent American citi-zens.
Thousands are skilled and in-dustrious
artisans, and thousands more
are hard working, thrifty, and fairly
intelligent. But it is also not to be
denied that there are tens of thousands
•vsho are ignorant, lazy, and vicious,
and that from their ranks come near-ly
all our dangerous anarchists and a
large part of our criminals. Their
presence is an actual menace to the
well-being of the Eepublic. And even
when they die, their children, who will
take their places, will,be almost as
unfit for the duties of American citi-ship
as they. Is it not our bounden
duty to be considering this matter
seriously and to take steps to protect
ourselves from this threatened harm ?
Unfurl t h e F l a g!
A crusade for the display of the
national colors on all public buildings
has been commenced. The agitation
is worthy all encouragement. From
all buildings, the property of munici-pal,
state and national goyernments,
the stars and stripes should float and
the movement would lose " none of its
merit if followed by private individu-als.
"It is well to remind our busy
and bustling countrymen that we:
have a Government and characteristic
institutions which should not be for-gotten
and there is no better reminder
than the national emblem lifted high
toward the blue. The average Ameri-can
citizen grinds on in his daily
routine with scarce a patriotic pulsa
tion save when stirred by some unu-sual
event. A glimpse of the flag
exhilarates patriotism as fresh air the
physical system. It awakens patriotic
sentiments as the muezzin's call
arouses the religious emotions of the
Moslem.
Good. Carpenter on Earth, hut Yearned
for Higher Things.
TONAWANDA, N. Y.: Harry Schoen-feldt,
a Black Rock carpenter, com-mitted
suicide here by shooting. At
the coroner's inquest the following
curious letter was found on his body
was read :
As I have been engaged for the past
forty-five years successfully in the
carpenter traid, being sixty and a
half years of age, I have decided to do
something higher and better. The
bible says ; "In my Father's house
are many mansions," and being as
there is so many they must need some
repairs. I've been a good carpenter
on earth, and I guess l ean be in
heaven. I therefore send you this day
my last respects from sitting under an
oak tree by the shore of the Niagara
near the Landell farm. My best
wishes to all who wish to know any-thing
about me.
name.
She Scorned to Answer Such a Ques-tion.
" Does it feel the same when a girl
kisses you that it does when a fellow
State Items.
Rabbits will be sufficiently numer-ous
for the gunners in Chester county.
A Pittston clothier announces a
" great Johnstown flood sale of fine
clothing."
Allan Muth, a slater, fell from a roof
in Allentown and was billed.
Constable Emers, of Towanda, has
caught and caged a humming b i r d -
something rarely seen in captivity.
The car that bore Lincoln to Wash-ington
to be sworn is now running be-tween
Wellsboro and Antrim,
The Pittsburg Johnstown Commit-tee
has wound up its affairs, turning
over $160,000 to the State fund.
Crawford county farmers are build-ing
silos extensively. This plan of
winter-feeding cattle is growing.
Half a dozen gas wells are being
put down in the eastern and southern
parts of Brie City.
Mrs. Hunt, who made a reckless
jump from a parachute at Shamokin a
week ago, is still laid up with a sprain-ed
ankle.
The publishers of Grit, at Williams-port,
have been acquitted of the charge
of sending obscene literature through'
the mails.
Ben Graham, a farmer residing near
Deckards, Crawford county, died from
the effects of ivy poisoning.
A 15-year-old boy, named Frauken-ñeld,
had one of bis eyes knocked out
by a vicious cow " horning" him on
Friday oh a farm in Salzbury, Lehigh
county. - -
Milkman Beatty's horse met with a
peculiar mishap in Meadville. He
was stricken with paralysis in one
foreleg while beingdriven at a leisure-ly
pace.
At Wilkesbarre John Tate was ac-quitted
of responsibility for the death
of William Snell, who was killed by
a blow or fall during a fight in a Pitts-ton
saloon.
Samuel Epright, of South Lebanon
township, Lebanon county, fell from
a straw-stack and landed on his head,
on Friday, causing complete paralysis
of his body. He is not expected to
recover.
W. Brockway, aged §6, and Miss
Maggie Hartzell, aged 17, went to the
Court Clerk's office in Clarion recent-ly,
took out a marriage license, and
were married right on the spot by
Commissioner Bell.
you ?" I heard a chap ask of
his fair cousin. Ineffable scorn up«
tilted the nose and contorted the mouth
of the maiden, and she declined to
answer such a silly question at all.
Elopement of a Clergyman.
LOUISVILLE, ICy.:—Rev. Charles
Bohannon, a blind Baptist preacher,
twenty-seven years old, eloped with
Miss Yica Alford, the twenty year-old
daughter of an old Catholic family.
She had been intended for a nunnery,
Falling in love with her Bohannon
had converted her. This caused her
mother to hasten preparations for her
entering the convent. The elopement
prevented this.
The mother found the two and
drove them from the house of the
groom's aunt, where they had gone.
The next day she sent for her daugh-ter,
pretending that she had relented,
Getting the girl in her power, she
spirited her away, and the groom has
been seeking for her in vain. He got
out a writ of habeas corpus, but the
girl's mother denies any knowledge of
her daughter's whereabouts.
Learn a Trade.
A good trade is something which-bank
failures or commercial panics do
not destroy.
It is a passport to all countries and
climes.
Something which can be carried in
our heads and hands.
A demand not whieh passes current
everywhere.
The one thing that cannot be learned
in an academy or college.
A strong crutch upon which to lean,
The friend of our youth who will
not desert us in old ageior affliction.
The only language understood by
the people of all races and climes.
Beyond the possibility of decline at
any time—years enhance its value.
The only property wliich cannot be
morgaged or sold.
It is a calling which can be declined
or taken up at pleasure.
Something about which neither
friend nor kindred can quarrel.
She Wanted to Know.
Many incidents owe their fun to
locality. It is the unexpected and the
inappropriate that incites our,mirth.
One Sunday morning, in the
Brooklyn Tabernacle, while .I)r. Tal-mage
was in the midst of an interest-ing
sermon and the eyes of the great
congregation were riveted upon him,
and the stillness of death pervaded the
huge edifice, an exceedingly comical
incident occurred.
Down in the cbntre of the church,
almost crowded out of sight by her
older neighbors, sat a black-eyed miss
of six years. Directly in front loomed
the bald head of an aged man.
While the little girl was looking at
the shining pate with curiosity, a com-mon
house fly circled around and
alighted on the head. It stood
motionless for a second, and then
moved softly over the smooth and
shiny surface.
The aged gentleman was deeply en-grossed
in Dr. Talmage's sermon, and
for a while evinced no uneasiness from
the ticklish manners of the little in-sect.
All the while the child's eyes fol-lowed
the movements of the fly. She
was deeply interested, and looked
around to see if somebody else wasn't
enjoying the scene.
Suddenly the old gentleman's*arm
shot up, and came down with a re-sounding
whack upon his cranium.
The little one behind had been wait-ing
for this, and, sliding out ot her
seat before her mother could check
her, she placed her chubby little
hands on the old gentleman's should-ers,
and, peering over into his face,
unmindful of the time and place,
asked, with much animation :
" Did 'oo kill it ?"
OWEN P . BRICKER, Esq., attorney
at-law, is in town every Saturday and
Monday morning and can be consul'"
on all legal business. Lancaster
48 North Duke street.