Pittston Gazette and Susquehanna Anthracite Journal

              ■ u THE V - I MIHAIM MTmiem v HSnrmrtilf, Jllnrraj, JBkM«I. «* flgrimtoal 3ntmit! FftlD with the preMt 01m af afikira. t* CoL C - d|d. 11 ' itffoUiilir tbMt thirty.' [m 1M bmilyV . fcyiMj WkfMd w4r -, *?, w lj» Jmftttflttl Sjniro ia MWMW y \» rnniUm M tmy \ buiK lb 4ymrt«t -_imJr- Mhft riMwInrk - ftre minute* aftaf. But ttwv««i» «ot religion, «4 •otommw) -* family prayer—that •very ng|t and Wan hie prayer, lirmirf" Ukg^L"toP' and paw «t MM that wife ml children, aistsimad their f*mllr'otwe»ior and iDMeiimei vititAMi UogAg' w IvilMTn wotS^aL^ JC? Dromiaed MMiMoe, imv8M*' »y«w: •henever - negro ' / V i ZE TTE • • f $t Canttfrtj, 3nstrartf(m, Imturmttrt, fct. )-Cma Itnllnrs fn Jlmmm. 51 ssrtldtj £etS3|iiptr-(SraoM hi %m. liftratart, TftMn, tjre VOLUME 2.--NUMBER 37. / """TSSfj l1 •:-r~+- - ' MTTSTON, PENNA., AY, APRIL 23, 1852. WHOLE NUMBER 89. - - ooix omaa by awry confined noiee shores H» listened, and heard att ttbUsiial Muffling of teet—some one cobbing violently and tome one talking Very hurriedly ; end when he reflected upon Col. C.'e singular more, ments, and the peculiar expression of hit oounlenance, he became alarmed, and determined to go ap and aee what waa trans he reaohed the head of the atairs, he was startled by seeing Moees in the middle of the floor down upon his knees, with hia arms around the Colonel's waist, and talking meat rapidly, while the Colonel stood weeping audibly. 80 soon aa the Colonel could sufficiently control his feelings, he told Mr. B. that he had never been able to free himself from the influence of Mil see' prayers, and that during the past year be and his wife and all bis children bad been converted to God. Moeee responded: 'Bras God, maass C.,dent way «p hea, I neber Ibrnit you hi my prayers—I always put de ole masaa aide de aewooa. Brass God ! dis make Moees tink boot Joeeph in de Egypt again.' The Colonel then atated to Mr. B. that his object in coming to Baltimore waa to bay Moaea and his femily back again.— Bui Mr. B. assured him that waa out of the question, for he could not part with him; snd he inteoded to manumit Moeee and his wife at forty, and his children at thirtyfire yearn of age. Moees waa not fhr wrong in his reference to Joeeph. For when Joeeph was sold into Egypt, God overruled to his good, and ha obtained blessings that were far beyond his etpeetashms t so with Moses.— Joeeph eventually proved the instrument in saving the men'e eoul who sold him. Old Moeee is still living and doing well. He long since obtained his freedom, and at present oceupiee a comfortable house of his own | and I euppeee sings and prays and shouts to hia heart's oontent. Editor—'Squire, your Mil is ohly Ave dollars. " Pious man I" he continued. "He waa a member of the Methodist church." 4 -jhtmrn• mi wn«CBi wttxii n Mv flL Btotort A P. S. Ptulllps, Fuller, Crawford 4* Co. WM It' German subeoriber—Five toiler j tat ish vor behind, and five 1 bays you ahead, Vlch makee den. [German subeoriber pulli oUt ail old stocking, and oouote down out of it twenty bright hall dollars. Editor's eyes dilate) he beoomea Acer-dingly nervous, and shows symptoms of flying off the handle ! Exit patron.] The sky is clouded, but it never looked better—the light Was ttever stronger.-**. The horrors ofa long winter are forgotten, and sunshine feigns lo the heart." Even the accordeon in the bookstore underneath, which a few moments ego made an execrable noise, is now making passable music. In the exuberance of his spirits be could have shaken hands with his bitterest enemy. (A heavy step ta heard on the etairsf What! est it potibell— The streak has been so good that it must be a call on the other side. The next question waa a little delayed, but it earn®. In thate New Brick Store, Main St . FWtston, January, 30,1908. P_ JAMES L. 8ELF8IW3B 8 CO FISH, PRODUCE, AND GENERAL COMMISSION MERCHANTS, Km. Vl MBkth WWtm, "" ■t"S«uadkJH.A. desired ioforwharf iuatu Amtell and If MUX "bon't you think yott got gre-a-t cause to be thankful that he a ptoUs man, and save his ehist f" "Ido,"said the widow, abruptly, and turning her head to look out of the oar windtfw. The indefatigable " pump" changed his position, held the widow by, his " glittering eye" once mora, and propounded one more query, in a little lower tone, with his heed slightly inclined for. ward over the back of the seat. "WebeWhStbaSMl webearherhowal - Oh *ho hasM frm the war of Mfc^ M—'iin rfnn nlwiitu **" Thar eaai»aha*wr*raBr hM nUapw a^r^heel or w^n*toaCwhe^w**i C«it 'l. gr® rMA Co), a -•••. * - tonsil tb»t n». did, Um'f hundred dollars.' *»a ••OaMm" k aahH*iil ***» tHJoy. at Two . OoLuiaafer um. Twe D«.u*a AKo rirrr i X24«ts wm b« ofcnifsd if not paid within the Mkftr wU to diecMUnaed until all arrearagee ▲4v«fttoM»«e are inserted Mrtipicboiuly at '.SsstS-^gsf months ot the whale ytat. .. f«D Work.-W« h«e wftwg •*£ liabment a well eelected aSeofttteM of Jo« Tr«, which wHt enable u» to etaeote, in ®e neateat ZjlFJn* **rtet? of Jrintor  Drintar* onrael*e«, we can afford to do Work cm as reasonable terme as any other ofllce In theeounty. All letters anJ commuftk4tlon« the (iazttu must be f6tr rAiD, eiwofiea by a reayonalbia name, to reedsa attentton.  COMTAITLT oa mum AS DRIED *L PICKLED FIBU, fct,* Sit: i fe* BOUJtMKHDBAS, WHITB A Oo. JMD miMS Of AnuwritotohwfrMiasarikaralMrtoth**!*; cum, ft1 hi* my aiekMtt in two »f n» of tM " Waa you cal'latin to get married agin ?" " Sir trt said the Widow, indignantly, " you are impertinent!" And she left her Deat and took another on the other aide of the csr. Wat hand at w I. lb. * A loasioc (tarllM lm«M In tb« bour« of lh« iUJIjr night- AkJn«taf*» lb« .0«t OM l« J A httfttaf *»8•!«»«■•»■»• P®**» *■»•» tola* 1 ne- u Pear* to be aiitt)* " huffy V said the ineffable bore, turning to our narrator, behind himD " She needn't be mad—I didn't want to hurt her feelings What did they make you pay for that umbcrel you got in your hand ? It's a real poofy one!—[Knickerbocker.Wfaies aid Liquors, n worik*• *«* Wh  "Why * ' Rccvuie I nid be is might I Ired y«rdi urdf ruttt «-T (Door opens, enters J.) Jerusalem ! If he paye, the millenium is at hand, and the next sound will be a blast from the final trumpet! J.—Well my hearty. 1 have just suecetded in collecting some old accounts, and as I owe you considerable of a bill, 1 thought I could do no better than let yoa have a trifle on account. AknctacfurttalootoM wtatoWoof rtopoattr trood- A baftac tat tin to* one—o monralnc fcr the deed! Awl tooo now all thlngi rwnetnbronce of tar brief, The tajreahe loved—the rerjr «j«*»»be need IB «M*- The oHMtt* HoWeto lta«Durto«o*M»rfbtwo»- Th. Joyow ootee of btrdo—the fWlUe wtad. of own'- . M, «n am of iMf I* opook, tad bar m tack • MM Of tar oo wildly wold wthwi wW »■«"' Moarafttyoad tearfully, «• tad tar down to n«~ Her new-born tata wan •tecpiaf la «ulet on tat Woo* I Yet hojefuHj aad ebeocAiBy wo lafco oar ojwo chore. Ami wo M within our boom tta oaachiae of tar lore I Wo know ebe boo not loft m, thong* tan wo Mtno Wo kaow Ao io not toot to no, bat only goon befcre! eel! him!' orders. A» ; and that he time 1 might within a hun, and I here ime in the night M Ml «nawer Business Cards, etc. Ill, M. BOLLINOMOMD, wm. c. wnrrt. PET1R AIDES. Feb. 7, 1861. DR. J. B. ORAWFORD P"**""*1 w Uw **° „„ «f Pa. PBBOT* HOPFMAM * Co., KORWARDWG • OOMMISION MERCHANTS No. 41, north Whw #3 Worth. Witor Btrtot, bolow In* It I*HI LA DC LPHIA D A DOOTbfl AS III A B60TOB. A self-sufficient humbug who took up the business-of a physician, and pretended to * deep knowledge of the heijing art, was once called to visit a young man af. flicted with apoplexy. Bolus gazed long and hard, felt his pulse and pocket, looked at his tongue and his wife, and finally gave vent to the following sublime opinion : "I think-he's a gone feller." " No, no!" exclaimed the ' sorrowing wife, "do not say that." " Yes," returned Bolus, lifting up his hat and eyes heavenward at the same time, " yes, I do say so; there arn't any hope; not the leastest smite j he's got an attack of nihil 4U in hia lost frontis-— " Where ?" oried the startled wife. " In his lost frontis, and he can't be cured without some trouble and a great deal of paint. You see his whole planetary system is deranged, fustly, his vox populi is pressin' on his advalorem ; secondably, if not more; thirdly end lastly, his solar ribs are in a concussed state, and he ain't fot any money, consequently he must ie." AtttaW 1, miU 01 U he terms. quart** wtiry when he Wk We to tell (•• he ton bmM MM womo MD| hour or tw» him a milr our whole generation ; would hevi interrupt the enjoyment ot women woulo cry, and it wo. and even after 1 times be Oearli lo sleep; fori' hear him pray . finished. I bore then forbk"' Moms Editor (strongly impressed with the same opinion)—Under ancn circumstances) in the language of Dummy Allen. " Happy to meet—happy to part—and always happy to meet again." [J. deposits two X's on the table, aees the e.itry made, and leaves.] Editor has reached a state of perfect biles, and whistles Dolly Day, with variations, when the sanctum door again opens, and a prominent Whig enters. Whig—Believe I owe . you Locofoco prin'ers a small bill for advertising. Don't like the principles you advocate, but 1 would just as soon do business with one party as another; besides I know you have muoh the largest circulation in this vicini. ty ; and, in short, I know what's what. Editor —Good. Your bill is *9 00. BTMKTS * otmmss, WHOLESALE DEALER8 IN FISH, FRUIT, OILS 8 PROVISIONS, and Produce and Comwilstim Merchants, So. 248, Fulton Stiwt, near Washington Market, New York. O. A B. would call the attention of merrhanU of Northern Penn.vN*ni« to thrir •JP'J of Pith, Pratt, Oil* »n.l Prorlilnn., which they will icll upon as fkvortblc urm« m any house in Nt* Ydrfetty. Rafarancaa. Wtkoff Cfc Co., Pitteton, Fisher 8 Booa*du«, \V ilkeabure. Franklin Platt 8 Co., Philadelphia. Jan. SI, 1851.—ly* ta, prayer in his and morning; and It was impoeai«p««lylfThan he you might hear would pray for and all my children, and o the third when we For the Phuton Ouette. OB VWtfaMr Z«««Mt Mmi Johnta, Well* * Co, MAMVFAOTtmUUI AND WUOLEliU DBALEEi IS BOOT8,  SSKD083 MI® ILS^'ifSlSlE, Me. as Oourtludt Stroet, (Fir* door abort Uu Mtrckanlt' Hotel.) iame* w. jounion, { 11 ■wwrrr,«. a. K. WCLT.S, j S. YORK. [ C. T. PI • January 84,1831. D7- IT WALTU BtVtKOTOK. Iftarcry aoUtoda eome lovely Sower Aionaa the grove aad btootni in traaalent hoar, .tod. In tkla looe, yet bMutfful retreat. On* almpW Oow'rot bloaaonM fclr and aweet: Sweet u the wild roeeldlu native Trie— like that, her ebeek wee delicately pale, Blending the Hly* wttk the wee* kne; tier eye wee eofljy teodor, large,aad Mar, jfnd from tie beaming orb of llqttld U*ht, Like moeu-beeme gliding Jhro' the ihadci of night. The glancing raya thro' taw, del* tehee etole, la mulling radiance dertlag from the eool; ,4i«and h er poHati'd brow, awl lorely tee, Dork ebeenut epUtoeke eotPd wtth winning grace: tUf bra tho* low. Wee gfecrfnl end lb* wtng Of riatag lark net lighter than Ike aprlng Of her alaetle ttxx, whoae airy bonnd flearee eeeart to towah thealtghtlyprintedgrooad; In every etep the walehfhleye might ttace thq anafeetad air of !womnd tbeheart, and apeak the apoileea Blind. Ok! who. wttk cold und Mated eye eoridaee Book blooming yooth, aoek awaM elmpHrlty, Sock pore and vtfgttt Innocence »-nc« I, A young e«lh«*aM, tor lha very hoar I in tkoee modeetekarioa, I Mt thetr pow'r, Jtnd feeling own'd—bat wky relate the natt Enough—wc mot—we lov'd— aad wa an bleat. Eviaauoo, Jtprll l*i l*8®-  tiMi. r. i*r.»Ti, I cm*, o. ccrtim. J March 08,1851-1y. ciso. w. BHA1NBHD a Oo. prayer* would /ad destroy the y company. The the children would - almost frantic: , it would someoefore ! could go to roe that 1 could hours after he had Wng as I could, and so loud any more. ai©3®83» A day or two since, while seated ir. the editorial department of our establishment, posting books, pondering over debts due ue by delinquents, and showering leftbandied blessings on the credit system, our reveries were suddenly broken in upon by the entrance of a subscriber who has taken the standard tar seven years, during which time he had paid on account 0 doU tars, ditto cents 1 "Halloa I" thought we, "here's a promise to pay one of these dayt." A mistake as the conversation proves : Subscriber—Mr. Printer, 1 believe 1 have taken your paper about—let me see —ah, yes, about seven years) and all that time, too, I have lived off the Portage Road; how you have lived, I do not know, but precious my money have you fingered. Howevjflp make me out a receipt now, and hagn your money. [Subscriber deposits $14 on the table, whioh the editorfyasps nervously for fear the subscriber's mind will change, and fills out* receipt.—-Eiit subscriber.] As might naturally be supposed, the thermometer oi the editor's feelings went up into sunshine 14 per cent. Another rap at the door— '• Come in I" 103 Murray, ntar Weft Street, Mew York* Oio. W. Brjuvkud, bav,d ,ILDr''' (Aug. 3,1850.--ly*. _______ (Whig pays, hands over a new advertisement and leaves.] Another knock! "Walk in !" (Enter a lean, long, lank, cadaverous looking, middle aged gentleman, dressed in black, with white neck cloth. Editor takes him for a preacher, and bows deferentially.)8tranger—I am the Travelling Agent of Doctor Julius O. Killemoff's Universal Regenerating Depttrative Resurrection Syrup, which I wish to advertise in your Ml© raw qobbrt A OO. Wholesale Druggists, No 177 iVartA TAirrf Street, A few Joon ebore Vine Street, K«*t ude, AT WHOLESALE. FHOTHXNOHAM, NEWELL A OO (Late W. M. Newell A Co.) HAVK taien the Caparioua Store Na.bl Dnttdw«», where the* will keep an extanatec atoti of BOOTS aud SHOES of the beat *yle and 4"Slllthlnt* Wyo«l»| Valley are partknlarhr invited toaall and examine oar aloe*. New York.Jawoary I, MM-—'tf.  PHILADELPHIA. Jib** B. WETNt „ but soon transit never to whip, but iW_ D-* rptorm incorrigible, I sail him. This keep* tbem in better subjection, and is less trouble than whipping. I pardoned Mooes twioe fbrprayingsoloua, but the third time I knew | must sell him, or every negro on the farm would soon be perfectly regardless of all my orders.' 4 You spoke ot Meets' quarter; I suppose from that he haa a family.' ' Yes, he has a woman and three «hilC dren—or wife, I suppose he calls her now, for soon after he got religion he asked me if he might get married, and I presume they were.' ' What will you take for her and the three ohildren ?' A Pass Wont OHM GILBERT. Mr. Lover tells a good anecdote of an Irishman giving the pass word at the bat. tie of Fortenay at the time the great Saxe; was marshal!. Drugs, Medicinea, Chemkala, Fallen' and Dyere' Artie let, Painta, otta, Window Olaee, and Paintera' Artidea • Anrthaeanea' Oloaaware, Patent Medicinea, fc., 4*. Augaat 80, 1850-tr- . C The pass word h Saxe; now don't for* get It Pat/ said the Colonel. •Sacks! Faith and I will Mil my father a miller v Who goes there !' cried the sentinel, af. ter he had arrived at the post. Pat looked as confidently as in a sort of whispered howl, replied ; Bags? yer honor.' EAOLEtHOTEL. paper. [Editor lights a cigar, cocks his legs upon the table and feels very independent.] Editor—We don't advertise quack medicines at this establishment unleas paid for in advanee. Travelling agent—Excuse me, but this iD no quack medicine, but one highly re. oommended by the faculty. What are your term* for half a column a year 1 Editor—Twenty dollara. [Agent does not appear to be a bit taken aback, as is usual on suoh occasions, but draws his Portmonaie.] Agent; Here'a five, and five are ten, and five are; [Scene suddenly changes; editorial room and lank agent fade away ; Editor finds himself at home in bed ; wife shaking him.] Wife; It's six o'clock. Ain't you going to market? Editor (slightly riled)—Everlasting per. dition seise the market. Didn't I toll you last night 1 had no market money I [Editor turns over and tries to continue the dream, bat the charm ia btoken, the spell is gone, and all that remains is an uneasy dote, which is interupted by the Junior of the family bestriding him for a hone, and clutching his hair for a bridle rein.] (Scene changes to breakfast table.) Wife—I should like to know what you were dreaming about this morning. Editor—Why ? Wife—Because when I awoke you, you oontinuedgrumbling in unintelligible language. The only thing I could understand, was, u it's an infernal shame you didn't wait until it was a bandied; enough to gives a ghastly grin, seizes his hat, rushes out.of the house, goes to the offoe, and works off the outside!] GEORGE LAZARUS, PITTSTON, Pi. OOOm * TAWAMDT, ,NFO.T,». A«P DKAlEEt IN Foreign Wines and Liquors, No. 11 M«w BtoMt, M«v Tort R. Kl'DOLPIIVI COOFKO, CHi». A. TiSZlNDT, JB. Auguit 30, 1850.—ly»  Wasn't All*. 8, IfOO. ' Dy O. R. OOBMAM, M- »• iluneclftiUf tenders KU PmfewOonr.1 •ervfcw to the citixen* of PitlMon and »icinity. Officenearl^oppositethe Post Office, PilHton. Old Moms. Mr. B. wh a merchant in Baltimore, and did a very heavy business, especially in grain. One morning, as he was passing over the vessels that lay at the wharf with their various commodities for sale, he stepped over the deck of one, at the stem of which he saw a negro man sitting, whoee dejected ooantenanoe gave sure indication of his distress; and he acoceted him with— H. A. QOTJLD * CO. WHOLESALE CLOTHIERS, (8" A chap walking out camfe across eld Mose, sitting in the sun, fishing. " Well Mose what in the world are you doing here ?" « Fiffin." •• What 1" C. P. BOWMAN, ATTORNEY AT 1LAW. m d Rt8l E»t»te Agent. Office on Main Street, . nomie (be foundry, I'ilUton, Pa. Au|. «, 1850.—ly. •  No. 221 Wuhiagton Btnat, Corn.r of Barclay SEW YOBK ' If you want them for your own um, I will take seven hundred dollars; but 1 •hall not call Moaea nor then to go out of the State.' C. If. A. ffOULD, I R. •. GOULD, f [Tall countryman enter*.] Countryman—Well, Mr. Newspaperman, how dy'e do 1 Been taken your paper a dingnation while, and it ia a long time aince I paid anything. Wouldn't be without it no how—aa your lint of market R rices saver me fifty dollars a year. Realj too bad that I havn't attended to it sooner. How much is it f C,• W« invito the attention »f Ooontty **- hnnta and other* to W toll ami daairabte atoek oI tUatlv-made Clothing, which we offer at »ery low ratca. Merchanta viaiting the city tor the pnrpoae of purchaaing Oooda in our line, would do weH to give oe a call before purchaaing elaewhere. September 6,1850,—tf.  J. BOWKLEY 4k BUTE A, Coal Merchants, • I with them all for my own use, and will gire you the fourteen hundred dol- » Fiffin." " Fishing! Well, what is the reason that you cannot talk? What's in your mouth ?" ' Hey man what U the matter with you thia morning V «Ah, maaaa, I'se in great trouble. •What about»' «Kaee I'm fotoht up here to be (old.' «What for t What have you been doing 1 Hare you been stealing, or did you run away, or what t* 1 No, do, mags*, none o dit; it « bekase I didn't mM d»au4ea.'__ Ofici Corner of Main and Rail N°ad Struts, PirrrroN, Lczkbne County, Pa. Angus! 16, 18W. —tC  Mr. B. and Col. V. then vent to B.'a 4tore, draw up the writing*, and eland the ■ale, after which they returned to the veaael; and Mr. B. approaching the Mftra, who eat with MD eyea And spaa the dank, aeeir.ingly wrapped In medltationa of the meet aw(ul foreboding*, said—— • Well, Moeee, I have bought you.' Moeee made a wry low haw, and every muaoie of his Awe worked with enetiaa aa he replied— C la you, maaaa V Where la 1 gw{ne, maara 1 la 1 gwine to Georgy V ' No,' said Mr. II. 'Im i merchant in the city beat, and yradir ia my aim, and I haw purchased your wile and children, too, that you way not be aepanu " Oh, nuffin but voms (worms) for bait." Matrimony.—Hot buckwheat cakeswarm beds—comfortable sKppe re—smoking coffee—round arms—red lips— (ahem!)—etc. eto.—ehirts exulting in but. tons—redeemed stockings—bootjackshappiness, Stc. Single BleMtdnttt.—Sheet-iron quiltsblue nates—frosty rooms—ice in the pitcher—unre generated linen—heellees socks —-cofieo sweetened with ioioJes—guttapercha biscuits—flappy steak—dull razors —corns—coughs ana cholics—rhubarbaloes—misery, 8C. Ugh! INDEMNITY D. L. PEOKHAM, Editor (running bis eye over the Ledger) —Oh, here it la—two end one'a three, and two are five—ten dollars. Fr»«kllN Fire Imnratce Co attmxbt at law. OJSm m Maim *'«C, *|* T«r*, Pa. OjJ5c« iW 163 Ctewit »««*, near Fiflh *t PHILA DELPHI A. Jul; It. mi- ~W\aD Mos8ias®^ FASHION ABLE BAKBEH A*D HAt* DRlfeER, Bwmmt «ur» •/ ttf L—g »*■', PUflf, Jolt 4, MM. * [Countryman deposit* half a aaw.horse, take* his receipt, hide editor an afieotfon. at* good bye, and vawoeea.} Another rap! What, not another customerf—Aa I live it ia! Wwoton. scras? Volilu Wagner, Adulphe t Robie, S amuel Grant, David S. Brown, j Jacob R. Smith, Morri» Patterson. «What kindofordorBl' • Well, nun stronger, I tell joa. Mm. m William werry atrtck man, and wairy nioa man, too, and ebry body on de place Fit to mine htm; and I broak da rata doe; torgot myself and got too high.' ' it ia fur getting drunk, then, ta rt! «Oh no, sah, not dat nodier • You are the atrangeat negro 1 have aaen for a week, I can get no aatufaetwn from you. If yeu w«»h» Ml like la ha pitched overboard, you bad hatter tall M what jrou did.* • Please, mum, don't frow da poor dieted nigger in de walla.'  C Thau tall mo what you are to be enld for!' Dr. G. UWUMIWOOP, Continae to make insurance, perpetual and limited, on every description of property ia town and country, at rata* as W as are consutent with security. _ The Company have reserved a large Contingent Fund which with their Capita! and Premium, rafdlv invested, aflords ample protection of the in- assets ef the Company on January 1,1848, and published agreeably to an Act of Assembly, were as follows, *b: Mortgages, - - 2* Real Estate, a'm ™ 23r"r\- SffiS Cash, C-e,, 50,038 W Office in Ike Buildup of L. W. Cratrford t Hard- Ware Store, FiitiUm, Pa. Aug. 2,1850. 'r- (Enter, Irish subscriber from the Moon—How are yeas t Bad luck to meeaelf, but ita owing this paper for a long time I am, and sure a good wan it it —eorrn a bether, barrin' inim from the ould oountbry. For what am I endue yoeaf (Editor refers to the book.) Editor—Two yean and six months— five dollars. [Irishman depoeits a yellow eoin bear, ing the impression of the American "eagle," pockets the "rayeait," he calla for and ieeff] Sanctum becomes pleasant, everything in it wears a brilliant bu» even the rattling of the sleet againet the window panes bee a charming sound. By Jose; another knock! "Wt3k in!" May I be abot if it isn't G., another fourteen dollar debtor. Ob, it cnnno* bo possible that be is going to pay. Yea he is!—by the beard of the prophet, he jerketh his cair.skin! C2kZ~Wedteid follow, you have dunned mo MWKT otwa, but of oowoo I oouldn't begin to Umso Ton for it. I determined to put it out of your power te dun me again for a whifo, whan Copt. West made this payment.• Let Me an, fourteen dollars Ibeifowc you snM k was, ok f f f tin r robbing his hands with glee)— EaaoUy, which pay* up to the 15tb of fifteen doUaro-just credit mo* doUar in advsnoo. (Exit subseri. (ssta»)—"A weight transferred from your conioieooe (p our pocket. [Editor prooeads to entor a oredlt, and aiacs "Oh thus may it ever be— when the song is oat short by the entrance of a German patron.] German subeoribo«w-V*ll, we-gatsa, Mr. Brinter, hob t Owe you for ter bapers, boh, how much* Can't real mooh, mineeelf, but mine ohiltren say ter mUsht hav ter baper, and I guess IT toy musht haf him, tor old man musht bay, heh (Gorman aubaoriber, who ia something of a wag, ohunkloa and give* the edkor a dig in the ribs ) LIFE and FIRE ISSURANC Women ought to measure from twenty* seven to twenty-nine inches round die waist, but most females do not permit themselves to grow beyond twenty-four; thousands are laced to twenty-two, some to less than twenty inches, and by means of wood, whaleSone and steel, the .chest is often reduced to oie half ita proper aim. nriH» KBvnoNE Ai ura isauiiakc* co. tfsg8gsaraS8attSx KsaresBSsisfflfiaj* DAY. Aafutt Oi tMt. , Aasrr. ' Br«H C3ed tor d.t! Aad mam, can I ttoM (M tka Sabbath, and evary night in tt» waak; and you can pnqr « often as and •»eryB't«ma you it be at gla hanawl, tfyoa wi nSd Ewrjr nwch; ifywi wiah to, TfMta Mr. *. — Mi* «ii U— »l-tsvasssBtsiss-£Si °£«i" «£? B! »ut ha gwiae to hafc all daaa oamwaJa Jom ; it Btoka M ttok hoat JoM«fc % w • law* ihildran jEjJ tar " You look rather flat," Mid the teakettle to the pan-cake. " I would take that as an insult," naid the pan-cake, "but ( am aware that you have been steaming it." ' : •" $ 1,909,003 *0 Since their iaeorporalion, a period of 90 years, thay hate wiiii upwards of \ wulUtm h* buUnd ihnupuU MUnU* by «rs, hereby affording ,ri- Icnce of the adventaf.oflnsaranee as well ae the ttbHUy.awl disposition to meet Wdh promptness, all "* CHA8 N. BANCKER, Pre'l. D, C» Bancibr* See'*- kelsons desirous of insuring their property ia ,uh(u county or its neighborhood, will receive Hetkdon on explication to V. L. MAXWELL, Agent, Wttktflbtm Pa ,4;'8aar E. I IOXM * C# , •Ire the sdraooemaot of ihU noble urt ln our countrjr, oj :«aK?MruMSiass7! s "firnafisr— Prloe—AO C*nU per number. Adflw MlWri, p«t-f M Phtk4^Dec.lM85l. • For praying, aah.' 1 Portraying! llwt In a at»a«§Mj»ia '■* Dto pray?' , • O yes, aah, be let n» pr*y aney, Wit I hollers too loud.' . •And why did you bollow w load » your prayerV  «Kane, do 0ptnt«0me»on ara, and I gate happy fore I knowa it; don I gMoi I am t •trof moaolf don; den I knowa nufBo he* myn'i rule; don I holler If ole fetin hiseelf oome wH all do mho ok do V* airion.' " • And do you auppoM J»w »a«ei really aell you for that V 4 Oh yea, no help for me now; kaae when raaaaa Will una ray one ling, he not do anoder.' Bather IaqoiaiUv*. A gentleman riding in an eastern railroad oar, whioh was rather sparsely sup. plied with passengers, observed in the seat before him a lean slabeided Yankee, every feature of whose fkoe seemed to ask • question i and a little oircumstanoe soon proved that he possessed a most " Inquirfng mind." Before him, occupying the entire seat, sat a lady, dressed in deep black; and after shilling his position several times, and mandtuvring to get Ab opportunity to look In her face, he at lenlth " catight her eye." He nodded familiarly to her, and aekftd, with a nasal twing uttelriy litcapable of imitation, " In affliction I" " Ye% air," replied the lady. 44 Parents 1—father or mother 1" 44 No, sir," said the lady. 44 Child, perhape I—a boy of gal f" " Noi sir, not a ehlld," was the response, 441 hfeVe ho children." 0$~" Once upon a time".a young man met an dd woman, in an English town* driving several Rsses. " Adieu, mother of asses,' said he. Adieu, mj/ ton 1" was tft* old woman's reply. The fellow went odl his way, feeling for his ears. WILKES-BARRE MARBLE YARD. rpHE subscriber -ill ht» I ■*»»*D 1 Wilkesbarre, at the old shop formerly occupied by Durmer Cf- Jones, where he intends to manufoe- Grav« Sttmti, Tomb*, Monument*, Mantlet, TabU Covert, +c., 4-c. ' PoOr old General DnbiHtr/ eiclaimed Mrs. Partington, ' It U surprising how long ■ he lives aoa what sympathy he excitea, the paper* Are full of remedies for him.' Ftrt Bbiekwd Hitel SB AMOTK. HODODON would respectfully is- SaMaggwsa1: His Bar witt always be ftiroished with Ch» choi-are win be given to horsee, and every acoommoiation afforded which can contribute to the comfort if travellers. Pert Blanc hard, Jan. 17, 185!~ly. Jenny Lind ia a golden treasure, but •he i a new in the handa »f the Goldsmith, and, we suppoee, will tM Worked up—into little t+inktU. and aH articles found in Us ins, a* lew P*» — Also, LETTERING and CARVING can bedsne at this place equal, or batter than at thecfey. Work delivered when ilesired. Orders received by mail, as well as all others, promptly executed. Shoo on Main street, three dears below the Public Square. BENJAMIN J0NE8. WilkeSbaffe, febtt, I»l—tf. « Wbnt is your bum f* * Moves, mh.9 « What ia your maater'e nam# t' 4 Maasa name Col. Willum C •' C Whore doea he liver C Down on do Baein Shefth.' • la he a good mueterf Doea he treat you w«ll f «O yea, maasa Willum good ; no botta maaaa in do world.' ' Stand up and let me look at you.'— And Moaoa stood up and preeented a robuat frame, »nd aa Mr. B. stripped up hie sleeve, his arm gave evidence of unuauai mueoular strength. ' Yamjer he is, jisoomin' to do wharf' Aa Mr. B. started for the shore, he head Mosea give a heavy siglfr , followed by a Ptoses «4i«ptat/.*ll pleated Jut Mow had pound a few and far.w.ll to 1Dfc mlrtnm, the a tod all th. MM*, h* followed Mr. Iheeto™, toantoron the fuaoiaoM «*i«nD of tfca mMmtt brought tommST*. W4 hwrrwdlytoward* •tor*. Ho mmk rooogiibod him mCoI. and to Colonel'* inquiry after Maees, Mr. B plied that he *M up ataire grain, and in»itad him to walk up him. Soon Mr. B.'a attention was arrcs " Husband, then, 'expect 1" " Yes," was the curt answer. " Hum—cholery T—a tradin'-man, meb- For Mechanical matt in Maine applijtd for two gallons of rumt for ■' mechanical purposes." For what mechanical purposes?" asked the agent. •' For wising a wHi," w*s the reply. M5M53 I?®®®, Fa/hi onahli Barber and Hair Dreiser, In the Re«n adtotaiag Cohen's Clothing Slots, and oppositatneEagle Hotel, Pituton, Pa. W8s. zritt. "sr.«su? RIOHAXT A PKXXXITI, '• My husband wia a eea-fariHg ttiitn— the captain of* veaael—he didn't die of cholera—1m was drowned." OF MTT8T0N, Are authorised Agents for the above Establish ment. All Orders, Inscriptions, if*., submitted to ham will receive prompt attention.  of a hU c. he A Word to Bora.—Stick to your trade, boys, and learn how to itork.Hyon Wieh to be truly independent. There ja no more pitiable sight than a half-learned me- , ohanic applying fot Wo«; He is always at the foot of the hill, and labor «e be may, unless be babome perfect in his trade, ho can nevef rise. - Ohj drowned, eh t" pursued the in. quisitor, hesitating tor a bnef instant— " save his asked. «1fee,the vessel was sated; and my husband's effects," Mid the widow. " Was they i" uked the Yankee, his •yea brightening up. WOODEN and Willow Ware canbehad a the Empire Store, [may 9] O. *J fV)6A8Urifl£ and »ce A Lt kinds of Produce wanlad at the Rmgr f, A. Store, ffarmtre yoa will do well toeallbefer sell. (may O. ® J. TO BUILDERS. S F•u,• h;.«