Pittston Gazette

              KMT I It 1.1*11 O. r f(». I'J. f Oldest NewsDaDer in the Wyoming Vailey PITTSTON, L-IJZERNTI3 CO., PA., FRIDAY, .lANlIARY 8, 1892. A WeeKly Local and Tamilv Journal. r"«/T" M i wr-nty-one, sir, "AFTER ALL!" and meeting the old warrior he said: "I am an Indian; embrace me." "Welcome, my son." And the chief embraced liim. De Lille said that he was ready for whatever ceremonies were necessary. "I'll settlo it at the council of the braves to-night," was the reply. "You promised me a wife," said Do Lillo. "Give mo Nanita? One moon from my adoption into the tribe I'll take her." THE. BROKEN BLADE, "Plenty old to marry, Arthnr,»and I would advise yon to begin lC\pking THEY W TA' U-fT knowledge lui l jnst dawned, "yon wish to he joined in the holy lxDnds of wedlock. Stand up." A Skins of Joy niinws is one of the richest regions, agriculturally, that I was ever at. It is almost one nnbroken garden, with here and there a barlied wire fence, upon which a 3-year-old colt is hanging by the thorax. Corn grows here in great abundance. and in the nighttime the passionate antjx'in of a train load of hogs, side tracked under one's window, teaches us that all, all are bom to die. CHAPTER I " Bric-a-brac U tfoins out." BESSIE'S OPINION Eos t!i and drenrf *n faint with palnT "I have VDeen looking aroniM, and I have found a lady, and she has promised to be my wife." ar-innd." A Case Wliero A Tlinm }Dhant I»line Was And in five minutes they were hitched, spliced, tied and "jined" according to the laws of church and state.—Detroit Free Press. Fashion liazar. Bessie went to church that morning: She had never lieen before, "But she's old enough," said mamma; "Three years old, and almost four." lied with fear o darl \N IN THE CASE, twilight deepens, darker, and at last the dismal, ■ dead ami the dismal. Tlie commandant of a Cwi of the British army in Iniis. division List on, housemaids, to my song* Send tlie Joyful news alone. Lift your troubled hearts from care. Wave your dustcra in the air. No more hard enrned wages clipped To repay for treasures chipped. Sing and dance and laugh ami shout. Bric-a-brac is go inn out! And t re a.1 in vain? 1 tale of all! no, aud sunbeams fly; Cares aufl crosses. great and stuall, and dim the eye. te'er befall, Iter all! Tis I: omc year "Good. I hope she i3 worthy of yon.* "1 think she is, sir." ago having a very consider.; !ile (leg authority vested in hiin, : that his command inelu i who were illiterate. issued m o: one of the younger lieutC'naits detailed in each regimen t diers who conld not r D id each regiment, therefo duly detailed for thi; Two Hundredth tv this duty w- ! •ree of She had promised to be quiet: "No, indeed; bhe wouldn't cry!" Holding tight to pupa's linger. Off she went with sparkling eye. Fbde t,i „,it rt'i (1 Manse is hushed liko n, and the night wraps it The wind that moans lily through t he grim and naked of the bare and leafless elms i accompaniment to the gloomi- ris in its stead. ui r An Ktlectual llriuMlf. "G1hC1 you think so. Arthur?" W h 3 is sht\ nanvmen that God is watching— leatl "Your (laughter, sir." tiould be i-ch sol- p—| Wonderingly she saw the people. Saw the flowers and the best: Gazed up at the lofty arches. But the music pleasCg her best. Feeble Life"; Helpless, tossed by every gale Drifting, staking, on they go But ntro:wD hearts, iu deepest pain, Looitins up, through tears, to Heaven, Still repeat the sweet, sad strain; "EVn UDough dearest ties are riv'n I will tliank llim, though 1 fall? Clou's love w atcUes—after alll" m'.s «!io faint an 1 fail blessln -s never kuow; incur t»uu^ The young fellow does not work at tha Join, yo husband?, in the strain. Yours the profit uikI the gain. No more jaunts with wife to seek Costly nothingscalled "unique." No more monstrous hills to pay For some ugly piece of clay. Fashion puts the fail to rout,. Bric-a-brac is (joins outl Soft coal and its consumption do a great deal to depress the spirits of those wno love to uve on tiie sunny siile ot the street and keep their hands clean. In Chicago one must wash his lunula every little while, and then they are glazed in a moment whan he touches a stair rail or a window blind. It is very painful, indeed, to a neat man like me. "My son, we must see what she says to that; but I'll not object." bank now.—Arkansaw Traveler. writ They entered the wigwam, carrying sunshine into it. De Lille strode up to NaiJita's mother and kissed her. lie otneer to :D•'«?. In the v-: i *nml to P, ■ icham, a When it ceased and camo the sermon, Bessie frowned and fidgeted. "*Sh! be quiet,' Bess!" said mamma, But she shook her little bead. iii -jof tlin scene, and mourns mid the with a wail like tiie plaint of thn HE LOST. crier of death ordained That Ts to S«y, Ho Didn't Rncoeed In went up to Nanita and said: "Nanita, I am an Indian! Ilelp me to be a good one." 1'1'nt lamp in tlie one room lightcasts a weird circle of liglit li its muffling shade. Lighted by * a man, young in years, but pre-- •Iv gray, his forehead seared with ines that trace the finger touch oC its deep immersed in his papers, ist John Monntford rouses frori rk. "Ugh! What a night it is. 11s as if all the cares and dark Df the past had risen from their Getting the hnlltr young officer who ha 1 Dmc;l the Comfort, lovers, fall in line! Bend the knee at Fashion's shrine; Give that cranky dame her duo Since she proves so kind to you. Homes no longer will be shops. All that sort of thing she stops. You'll have room to walk about. Bric-a-brac is goiug out! Stood upon the red pew cushion. Waved her hand in queenly v.ay Toward the preacher, toward the organ— "Man, be quiet! ltand, you play!" —II. F. Lovett iu Churchman. Before I end this yarn I think I -will ttll a story. \V« always used to tell stories, and sometimes a good many of them, every night after we got home from our day's shooting. There is a negro man at City Point so old th-ct o«/K»uy knows how old ho is—one of those old knock kneed negroes about 100 years old, all twisted up ami doubled up with rheumatism, who walks or crawls about with tfce assistance of two canes, and is known as Uncle Joe. One day the old fellow was slowly making his way through the village street when along came a white man. a very well known character in that town, "hnlf seas over." He was pretty nearly "as fall as a goat." and he happene 1 to have his rifle with him, and a crack shot he in, whethei drunk or sober. As soon as he saw Uncle Joe seated on the stump he sung outi "I say. Uncle Joe, let me put a potato on top of your head and shoot it off. 1 will give you fifty cents if I bust the po tato or a dollar if 1 kill ye." regiment, Coura H Cur thy burden cheerfully 1 Pure in heart, unci stout of arm, then Through night and storm Her bright eyes danced in ccstacy, as she threw herself on his bosom and wept there. He looked round, and the mother was weeping on the old man's bosom. Even tic old warrior's eye was moist. After taking the iutro 1 regimental schoolin i *ter ] to the colonel one day wit 1 a rigmficant smile on lii.-3 face. I do not as a general tiling camplain. Neatness with me is a pleasing recreation. It is not my life work. I have slept in a third rate hotel with a person who moved in a social circle far beneath me, a person whom 1 had never met before, and who was also drunk, and who robbed the hotel while 1 was at breakfast, and who, as I was going to say. was a great coarsc man, but 1 forgot about it: and yet when I paid my bill and the clerk—who most always went armed—asked me if everything had been satisfactory, I told hint that it had almost seemed like home to me. lam c:nno Glorious victory thou ah alt see. Not a moment pause; nor sigh those 1 A Vacant Seat. Over faded joys so fond: Burled let the dead past lip. "I have to report," ho is not a single illiterate i dredth. Every man liin England, and every o: road and write perfectly l,"lhat there There was just one vacant seat in the street car and two women came hurrying and bustling in together and stood before the unoccupied seat. Hopo for blessings still beyond. Trust and hopC\ wUirte'er befall, God will keep tl»ee—after »ti. —Mattie D. Britts, In ®. Y. Leader. i:i the Two Hnn- Dovrn yn ohjocts, useless, oi l— Worth one lime your weight in gold. Dunt collecting stuff, aranntl From ww-h nook antl niche and haunt. Off! yo foes to brush and broom. Cumbering shelf and mantel room. Jar and vase aud candlestick. Fall In line! March! double quickl Hear ye not the (ueman'S shout— De Lille was adopted into the tribo with the usual ceremonies, and great rejoicing was there on the occasion; and, at the feast of sweets, when the maple sugar ran, ho brought Nanita home to his wigwam as his wife. She proved a good wife; always smiled upon him, and bore him many children. The blessing of the Great Spirit had come with her. of them can « to school CTilV sin 'inlKiiding "You sit down,-' said one of the ladwt? generously, waving her hand toward the seat. ill were all abroad tonight. I feC4 a premonition, a dread of something, I know not what. But pshaw! Away with sncli thoughts—Madelaine, Madelaiii'D!" Tho colonel, who wa old martinet, frowned b THE ONEIDA COUNTESS. "No matter," said ho. ders, and mnst be ol teacli the illiterates of are or- "Oh, no; yon take it." "No, I'd rather stand." "So would I." "Oh, take it. I've been sitting nearly all dav." Truo Story of a Frenchman's Life iou must He—There is a certain young lady deeply interested in me. and while 1 like her, yon know, still I never could love her. I want to put an end to it without breaking the poor girl's heart. Can you suggest any plan? Bric-a-brae is going out! - Kila Wheeler Wilcox in Life. with the Indians. But the echoes of his own voice rerned to him along the dark anil vanltpi'-sageway. The scampering feet of "But there are no illitera Tien WAY DOWN IN EGYW "Nevermind! You will organize some Yet sometimes 1 murmur. Maybe it is because 1 want to attract attention, like a critic. Sometimes I do speak up because it is necessary almost, and so I state right here in print, knowing that I am answerable at the bar of Eternal Judgment, that there is a hotel in Arkansas where a new hill carpet in the main hall and a burnt rag in the reception room are almost an vital to the prosperity of the house as a jar of muriatic acid in the caster to help in cutting the In the year of the French revolution,* 1793, a young man of good birth, fine education and good address, who was glad to escape from Paris with his life, came to this country. lie was tall and handsome, wuh the manners of an aristocrat Finding nothing to do (for the physical labor of the docks was so much better done by the negroes that he could not stand the competition) he finally gave np in despair; and while he hail money for the few implements needed, started for the Oneida countJy, where he cut a few saplings and built himself a shelter from the weather, lie endeavored to support himself by fishing, shooting and trapping,,but had made little progress, when he was stricken down with fever, llis end seemed coming. He was alons and helpless, and, commending himself to the care of Heaven, he lay down to die. De Lille bccamo a leading chief among the Indians. His superior education, his knowledge of French, English and the Indian dialect became of great value with the and he kept his own tribe at peace with the whites, and he was much respectcd by our government. Thus he lived twenty years. at once." "So have I." '•But I really don't care to sit." "But I don't mind standing in the least." tied rat pattered across behind th« •cot aud the house is silent once . and John Mountford turned once wearily to his task. "But how am I go:'ig to make them"  3ILL NYE WRITES FROM THE OUT- "No farther (questions, Mr. Beacham. I shall issue an order to the captains of Companies A. B ami C to detail five men from each company to act at illiterate?, and you will give them daily instruction in the alphabet." She—Do you call there often? He—No. indeed. Not any oftener than 1 can possibly help. SKIRTS OF CHICAGO "Neither do I. Indeed, I often prefer to stand." Vnd world called him happy. A The owner of broad Hie Sermon That Was Provided for a lmv ■pute, She—Call oftener.—Truth. Consideration—Snnnrier* an a Wait Sta- "But yon look tired." "Oh, I'm not a bit. Now you sit down." lands, tlu husband of a beautiful woman. 1 had called him happy. Th® I'lu-Xported Kexult. tion—A Hotel Hxperience anil u ViBit lie visited New York, where he learned so much of the restored tranquillity of France as to beget the hope that some of the broad laaiis lie left there might be restore to him, and he was not mistaken, lie sent one of his sous to France to be educated, lie sent another to be educated in Columbia college, who afterward became a prominent lawyer in New York. knows ko much The old neirro looked up Rnd replied "Do you say, (Doss, you will give me fiftj cents if you bust the potato or a dollai if yer kill me?" The colonel's order was i.-sned at onco. Fifteen soldiers of the Two Hundredth were detailed an illiterates. Oiiee a day they were marched out upon the parade, with "primers" in their hands of the same sort, from which they ha 1 studied in school many years lDeforC\ and were gravely taught their 1 "There." ho said fondly, "just to show yon how ninc h I thought of yon I took yonr picture with my new instantaneous camera. Here it is." • from a Fellotv Actor. [Copyright, 1891. by Edgar W. Nye.} "No, you." "No, no, you. I get off first." "Then you ought to .sit down now and I'll take the seat afterward." "But I really don't care for it." "Neither do I." "Please take it." CHAPTER II. THE NEMESIS OK THE XTOIIT. In thf. Corn' Regions of Egypt, ) Just Outside the City Limits of v steak. "Yes," was the reply Chicago, December, 1881.} Leaving the last residences of South Chicago a little to onr right half an honr ago, we suddenly found onrselvcs in Egypt, the corn growing region of southern Illinois, the richest agricultural region I ever saw. excepting perhaps some portions of France, which do not count, for 1 claim that the large, yellow dent corn of commerce can only be raised successfully in the English language. Please do not regard me r.a hypercritical, for. if 1 am that it is purely because I do not understand the meaning of the word as I should, lint there is in Arkansas a hotel where the man wh.i can eat a whole meal and not Clo it under the influence of stimulants, can go through more suffering than any man 1 ever came across. \ wo: a. pale and panting, nerved "Well, den, go ahead, boss," said the old man. "Do you think it looks like me?" she inquired, almost tearfully. to ft desperate deed, comes stealthily through the darkened hall. She shivers The potato was placed on the top of the old negro's head, and the white man staggered off about thirty paces and drew a bead. The sniolce and fire shot from the rifle nnd the potato spun higii in the nir. "Why—or—yes. of course." as she hears the wind go by the house, riding the storm with loud discordant criesf and then she pauses, parting the portieres and stands with gleaming eyes against the purple pall of the velvet hanging. Her face is white, her raven '.renscj hang nnconfined. She clutches the curtain and glances fixedly at tho 3 by j yonug "Then all is over. I cannot be jonrs. It must fDe i.;y money and not myseli that yon seek." —New York Sun. This goes on until both women try to sit down at the same time and one of them sits in the lap of the weary looking young man, who jumps up and goes out and stands on the platform, thus making room for both women, and the tormenting dialogue comes to an end.— Detroit Free Press. Lieutenant B.?och l. though the alpha- lie himself stayed with his tribe. Ilo was universally respected as a faithful ally of our government, and so continued to his death in 1835. bet was as famil to them as it was to him. or to the himself commanding general A Stsvrre Operation. Chollie—You look very pale today, ma deah boy. "Well, I'll be shoved." said Jim, do it, or I'm a sojer!" The soldiers of the regiment had gath ered about and enjoyed the scene. On the other side of the wood near which he had built his hut, but hidden entirely from his view, there lay an Indian village. One afternoon, an Indian girl, named Nanita, out berrying, espied the hut of the stranger, and naturally peered into it. Hearing no noise, aud seeing no oue, she finally entered and found a handsome man lying prone, very pale and apparently dead Her woman's heart was touched with pity. She saw, too, that, though insensible, the man was still alive. lie was restored to his titles by Louis XVIII., and so Naaita beramo the Countess Do Lille. She once visited France with her husband and was well received. Sho returned to this country, and spent her life in elegant luxury on'a large estate in the neif" "I did Yesterday evening a man came to undressing room just a little behind a professional card which was lightly covered with a rich bhick loam. Sinking in the card for some distance, I found the name of an actor who belonged to the "Singed Cat Opera company." which bnrsted here two weeks ago v. ith a dull press report which yon may have heard. I had stepped out of my dressing room a moment in order to hare room to take ontmy watch and Bet' what time it was, anu had just returned when he entered on the hot trail of 1 is card. lie said that lie wanted to see the show, their company having bust here some time ago, and would I pass one of the profession. Certainly, said 1. with a sort ol air of Alvin Joslin affluence and pie for breakfast which 1 can put on upon occasion. He had a faraway look and some pf the grease paint of a former engagement interfered with his hearing. He wore a Barneses scarf with a wonderful imitation of boiled egg on it, and his collar proved to me that however his health might bo otherwise his pores had been open all the time and active. He wore a frock coat with a short wa.i»t iuul hiD» C'11 lTc C-hrDnoK IKow. wore pinned inside the sleeves of same. Somehow 1 felt that if he hail thoughtlessly removed his coat 1 could have seen only a Prince Teek scarf and the play of his pectoral muscles. Possibly I did him an injustice. Possibly he had a shirt. If not, I never saw a haughtier man without one. He said: "We done a rotten business here. When we started out we had good paper and played to S. It. O. in South Archey, but the leading man got sort of multy on his plates* with rheumatism, and before a week we was stopping at a one plnnk housed; the oiijeitew got her skates on and tried to play opposite a jag that was out of and so she queered the Ho staggered up to Uncle Joe, fumbled aronnd in two or three of his pocketn, fished ont a half dollar and handed it to him. After this ple:udng farce had lxDen going on for several days, the colonel strolled up one day to the plaoo where "Beacham's BaWeV' as tit palled tlio "illiterate reciting their lessons, Chappie— Ya—as; 1 took ethaw this mawniug. unconscious man busy at his task. The jmrtitTiis quiver with the nervous tension of the slim, white hand. She stands n. goddess of wrath uprisen, a nemesis of Choi lie—Took ethaw! a tooth drawn? Did you have regiment 1=6 Solicitous Spouse—What makes yon look so worried lafely. You're not like yourself. In a Hot. The old man seemed very much surprised. It was n long time since he had seen so much money. He looked at it lovingly, bit it, turned it over, looked up to Jim, and said, "Well, boss, Fse sony I did not git de dollar."—Forest and Stream. detachment" were Chappie—No. the doc taw put a powua plaster on me back.—New York Press. jii hor- toon hood of the spot where she tir.,t savs her husband. It i it, it shall be done!" sue rnut"there is no other way;" and, fear- "Mr. Beat-hum." ho asked, "is your class making favorable-progress; "Very favorable, indeed, lieutenant, salntini* Great Lawyer—Well, I'm having considerable trouble down town. Spouse—Now you must tell me all about it. Pipkin—What! Having yonr patent leathers shined. and only bought them ten days ago! Wasn't the leather any goal? A P»tent Expiration. His son and hers is a t'.tled man in France to-day.—N. Y. Ledger. ful. she watches the man in the circle of the light, trembling lest he tnrn and Bee said the her. Then she again recovers her courage. "What would you think, John Monntford, did you know that I stood behind you and with this in my hand?"' "The men arc now able to read and write?" Lawyer—Well, yon see, I want to keep the office open till 5, and the office boy wants to closfe it at 4, and we can't seem to arrange matters.—Bostoi. Conner.The young girl paused not to think of his color. Il .-r fleet feet took her back to her wigwam, whence she returned with milk, rum and a blanket. With the latter she covered him, and, pouring a little rum down bis throat, she pillowed his head upon her lap and sat still and watched him. Presently tie opened bis tine eyes gave her a dim, wandering, wondering look. But he was fuint He saw, however, in the large, lustrous, black, deep-set eyes of the squaw legibly written: The lien. The quintessence of the omnivorous is supposed to be imaged in the hog, but a hog is a l'eabody among animals alongside of a hen. liens arc by nature monopolists. When the subject of victuals is mentioned they are evidently listening. Throw a handful of corn into a ten-acre lot and every hen in the inclosure will get a dab at it The last ben on the spot may not secure more than two kernels, but nothing in the hen's appearance will indicate that. It will step around with as much precision and gratitude as any in the flock and wear the most pensive smile you ever saw. A hen will not eat everything it sees, but it will try to, and there isn't one of them on the face of trfe.e. I'iirtf I *JOT TIllM/ con VT/J VtatTTy Of everything it has seen within the radius of a half-mile of its house. It is only when a man has kicked at a hen and missed it that he begins to understand how thoroughly hollow and deceitful this world is, and it is a marvelous fact in connect'on with this that he will miss the hen if he does kick at it and misses it if he don't—Danbury News. An I'nf.iir ,\C]vanla^r. "Perfectly well Potts—Leather is all right, but the patent seems to have expired.—Truth A crowd of eight or ten boys? worn shouting and disputing in Elizabeth street, near Canal, and the ' boss" tinalJy commanded silence and said: "You are atolo to report, then, that your duty is fully accomplished?" "I am." Hud she smiles as she holds np a curiously shaped knife, sharp and keen, with a fantastic handle of ebony. The man tarns uneasily, as if he feels what is to Tin- Kiglit Man far the I'lace. Biuro Bean wtt* horn upon r farm. "Then an order will too issned terminating the detail and returning the men to their dutv." Hill farm work didn't aj*ree Willi Hi jab Bean, an ho be Haiti, Too Slojr. "Now, then. Jim and Jack is to try to look each other out o' countenance. Set that bar'l down here." Monsieur Calino Was ordered fcy his physician to take a drive of an honr each day, and having no horse of his own he called a cabman for the purpose. bapi ilia wife glides past him tniperjeived to t he kitchen to open the sardines xith his ju t razor!—New York Evening ■TMh Hin't no place fer me." lie lived content w'ile ho could play Thus the "illiterates" of the Two Hundredth were no longer called upon to take daily instructions in their A, LD, Cs: but it was many months before their comrades ceased to rally them in quarters upon their school going.—Youth's Companion. Kz loim c7. lit- roil III we. Hut when they brought him work, he said, "Tlii* ain't no place fer me." A barrel half full of rubbish was lifted down on the walk, and Jim placed hihands on one side and Jack on t he othei, and they stood thus while they bent their heads forward nntil their noses were only a foot apart. One day he signaled a cabman and got in for his daily drive. The horse started up at a painfully slow gait. am ''Thou shalt not die forsaken, stranger." lin-uk i a Kulc. An ho lie lor the farm behln An run away to sea; There ain't no taters there to dig. An work If sknrcs," aez lie. But t litre the) made hiin scrub the deck; Thin witz too much: Hex he, F.z lie went lea pin overboard, "Thi» ain't no place fer me." "Hold on!" said Calino to the driver. "I must get another cab. It would take me all day to ride an hour with such a slow plug as that!"—Youth's Compituion.She signified to him as well as she could that he must sleep now, and that she would return after awhile and see hiin. ! l DOWOTAHhO-J ' THE I can almost imagine as I write these lines, resting my tablet against the slumbering subbosom of a fat man with massive rosewood legs, and, as I ever and anon get up to lie brushed off by the ptnvuiTnm xma fittuc mD n rtr-OTjwriting, I say I can almost imagine Joseph coming down here from his own home as a slave, pursued by bloodhounds possibly, and becoming private secretary to Governor Fifer mayhap. ON THE TRAIN. Ml# ill 1 ill Jhi "Now to look," fhM the bosn, a' the crowd encirclc! the barrel. "ami A Ilanl Knw In a couple of honrs the Indian girl r«twri»c»t to HCDr wiU. lood medicines for the night. Sf»e "fottod him still very feeble, but much better; she made him eat and gave him to understand by eye and pantomime that he must sleep, and she would see him as early as possible the next morning.the first feller as has tears in his eyes if — r»— ' ■ •' - ' »—■— Before taking his place at the barrel Jiin had turned from the crowd and taken a lDite of something Myly extracted from his hind pocket. The mystery of his action was soon explained. The pair hadn't been gazing into each other's optics over thirty seconds when Jack suddenly cried ont: 4 ¥ 5 ' thro:i«h (he ratfin wii; 1 Ms Ii-cIh like work." be noon allowed. Caller—Your daughter is at home now, is she not? I heard she had graduated at the Artistic, Literary and Scientific university. "This uin't no place fer ine." A merchant vessel picked him up. An i:i u hunk lit* curled, I'tilii lliey dropped him down upon Tile oi her side the world. Hostess—She is not at home. She has gone to a finishing school. An then ftiem pigtailed ("hlnamcn Set him to |jiC kin tea; He worked for Ik-If kii lionr. an said, "This ain't no place fer me. -f Why. this is jest like work." he cried. An awful terror spread Tlin• all his fecturs,an he fell Like one whoV dropped down dead. Anon I see liim try to wean a young Egyptian steer calf by putting his finger in the calf s month anil holding his Iieatl (the calfs head) in a pail of warm milk. Anon 1 see Joseph's feet fly out from under him as he flits across the horizon with a gallon of the milk of unkindneas down the bjvck of his neck. Such is life in Egypt under the Pharaohan regime. "Why, what for?" "Oh, to learn how to enter a room and sit d»wn and hold a fan and blush, you know."—New York Weeklv. In the morning the Indian girl told her mother about the stranger. At lirst the squaw was suspicious, but she went with her daughter to see the stranger, when her heart warmed to the young paleface; and, with true womanly feeling," she busied herself about the sick man.- The women removed him to their own wigwam for better nursing. ''Where's me backer? 1 want to pnt in a claim of foul! This lu re kid ha.- took a bite of raw onion and is breathin into my eyes to make the tears come!"— —Some years ago Prof. Ehein planted in the Frankfort botanical garden some of the trees from which it is stated the Japanese obtain their lacquer or varnish. The tree is known to botanists as the rhus verms, and it appears there are now thirty-four healthy trees, Rome thirty feet high. I'rof. Rhein has taken sap from a few of the trees and sent it to Japan for trial by native artists. It is. however, almost useless for Europeans to attempt to compete with the Japanese in their line, but the laequsr, if it can bo made One Way. 'Now stop t"*ising me. Don't yon it that the placard says, 'Do not an.• ti.e animals?'"—Harper's YSnng New York Evening World The Old Gentleman—Wh; her so many flowers if it is expensive anil you cannot a He went Into a fever. Fell to ravin like a Turk, An he thought thet he wuz ninnin All the time away from work. Once he dreamed thet he wuz work'n. An he leaped up RtronR an free. And lef hi* lDcd. an run an shrieked, •This ain't no plaee fer me." Thought fill [o yon send a horribly In the churches for colored poopla in some parts of the south, when a collection is to be taken, the lxD.\\ instead of being passed from pew to jiew. is deposited upon a table in front of the pulpit and the brethren and sisters are exhorted to conio forward and pnt their contributions into it. A writer in The Christian Union says: lord it? I wrote to tho Helping Hand bureau of Chicago several weeks ago, using, by permission, the name of our agent, and asking for a sermon. The Helping 1 land bureau supplies sermons at a dollar a pair to clergyman who are suddenly overtaken with that tired feeling. Much has been said in Chicago within the past regarding this bureau, and of oourso it has been hopped uiDon by all right minded clergymen. The Young Gentleman—That's just the trouble. If I should stop sending the flowers the florist would think I was losing the girl, and I should have to pay up. Thr.'e weeks' good nursing brought him round, and lie was a man again in all but strength. The patient endurance of the count, with his quiet, graceful maimers, won the little community. and all found a pang in their hearts at the mention of his departure.I)e Ki?ii«»tir. r—aw—Miss Figg, may 1 § to C oh my heart and hand to the her sex, the wose without a —Life, Hecome hack to America To hunt for rest an pr*c«. An at last he not appinted With full pay on the police. An his tired hoii! is untisfied, "I've fonn my place," scz he, "A! last I Rot away from work. This I.- the place for me." -S. W. Fos» In Yankee Blade. | j 3RtSS'NCROOM £ I %0 AOMITTAMC Mhi H.. iLJ/ few" .'{W • V''4# wTfe' f k W w./{y/4£g M" c r«i— .,. Sophleish, you are , propose to me in those very How to Tell Them Ap.'.rt "My aunt says I'm so like my papa that she can't tell ns apart; but I know the difference," sai'l Tommy "What is it?" ankt'l the vi.- "P.ipa wears su —Harper's Young Peo^ The old warrior, one morning, said; from trees grown in Lurope, may be used for other purposes than varnishing wood. The rhus coriaria, or varnish tree, grows in miny parts of what may be termed the Mediterranean district, and its juice is known for its deleterious or injurious properties, and has consequently been let alone. The Japanese, however, seem to understand it. aTid it is certain they make a beautiful lacqm r or varnish from the juice of their trees; but they keep the processes secret.- -English Mechanic. I had slipped into a back seat of a large African church at Columbia, S. C., one Sunday evening, and was watching the taking of the offertory, when one of the deacons, with that tact wbi ;h belongs to almost all tlie'Colored racD came and politely offered to carry up for me any contribution which I cared tc make. "Stranger, the time has come when yon should no longer be a stranger. You have a name in your own country. What is it?" Choi Yu-n All of ouab fellabo fawra of pwoposal, don'tcheritliannpolis Journal. I wrote for a sermon of the purring and somnolent variety, and got one for fifty cents which astonished me to death almost by reason of its accuracy in tilling the bill and meeting the demands of my letter. ' The sermon was addressed to our agent, en route, I having attached the reverend to his name and borrowing his address for fear that the shrewd but godless bureau on Dearborn street might suspect a job. use ; kuov indent and I don't Joy IT i boundetl. 'Arthur De Lille, they call me in my own country." Almost Killed Iliin. —Did yon lieali about poor, deah rhf poor boy is at the point of IlogartU** Line Clara—It seems that Miss Bristle is the daughter of an artist. Clara—Tell me, dear, if your form was like mind, what Would you wear at the masquerade ball? Maude—Is that so? How does he earn his living? "Then. Arthur De Lille," said the chief, "stay with our people another moon. Heat with us, fish with us, go to our council fires, smoke with us, then go bach to your own country. Or, if ,you like the red man's life and will cast your lot with us. we will adopt you iDto our tribe. Yoa bhall be my son; you shall be a hunter and a warrior. Adopt our custom and our costumes, and we will give you a wife from our I banded him a twenty-five ceti* piece, and with inimitable poinposicy he inarched uown the Ions: aisle, carrying the beggarly coin eo that everybody could Bee it. Suddenly he trailed on his W * , dwell Beg said—Why, no. Whateveh is the |%|| ' m Clara—He makes his own frames.— Truth. at tali/ Cholly Mamie—I think I should wear a bal loon.—Cloak Review. —IT is 1 vastly cad of a furnisher wied to sell him a ready made bier and Furnisher. The Bulge on the Janitor. Auntie—Look at the pretty cousin the angels have brought. Johnnie (visiting)—TDid bring him? ictn heel and started back, while the curious eyes of the crowd all turned to follow him. Arrived within speaking distance, the good old man called out, in a whisper audible to half the congregation: A Popper May I introduce a paragraph from this sermon which the bureau prepares while you wait? Let me just give you a few lines. You canuot be wholly had after you have done. If you are like me, after you have done hot tears will be playing tag down your massive cheeks and falling with a silvery plunk on the costly prayer rng. You may think that the words are mine, the won! painting is so good and so lofty, but L assure you, gentle and glorified reader, Miey are not. This is the method of dividing up the subject: — *.Ylien r.cme politicians they are found wanting—every C (Ticc in which there is a vacancy ~ Sifting^ e weighed Dora—Why do you call Jake a "corker?" Texas II o Was Hungry the angels "Mar aid Mrs. Hicks to the new wii.-it has become of those Cora—Bscauso every time I draw him out a little he p Dps.—New York Herald. TIT IS ACTOR'S REQUEST. Auntie—Of course. THE SILK WALK business. The manager piped her oil and fined her a week's salary, so she took a B. and S. with us and shook the company at West Pancreas, O. She was all right, the onjenem» was, except her legs, when she had a jag, and she could talk like a turtle dove and never dry up like some does when they get their skates on, but she was multy on her plates—see? And so now she is playing Little Eva. which is mostly on a death bed,'and where she says it's 'a lead pipe cinch.'" Johnnie—Then I guess they brought him in through the skylight and didn't see the sign in the janitor's office that says, "Children not received here!"— Brooklyn Life. Nanita explained what he did not understand to De LilJe, who, turning to the chief, said: tribe." It la Almost Everrt'ilnj Nowaday* to ['.• d win "Do yon want any change?" Companion. — Youth'3 To :• Solit.it P. inc. in Style. frightei here Sti mum," replied Mary with n jii t )b, "the cook's consin was CHy, and lie ate 'em all np. He's : citer at the museum, mum."— I bought thee o;iee Maln-l And I hull "Reginald loMai* Two girls were walking down the avenue the other day. They were both very stylish and well dressed, but they looked as if their elothes had been made at home by a woman who sewed by the day. Another girl passed them at a rapid pace, whose light cloth suit had an unmistakable Paris cut. Iler black hat was very high in the back, her foather was very Huffy and she walked with a curious motion, a simul- Uncle Thompson's Snrpi.-ne inside thee; And I put thev on her taper finger And wns exceedingly happy. She said sho rather liked it herself. I'm glad nhe did. For 1 would (jive ray life for Mattel, Provided I were on the point of death. Now thou art back in my iiossession. We have parted forever, that is, Mabel xaved •*It i3 well said. It shall be so," and offered his hand. the f tmele Isaac Tliompson, an aged colored man living in the Jersey pines, was very sick. His wife nursed him faithfully. seldom leaving his bedside. On 3 morning when the doctor drove up to the house he was surprised to see her sitting disconsolately on the doorstep with her apron thrown over her face. "Why, Aunt Sallie," he called out, "what is the matter? Anything wrong with iny patient?" "Oh, doc tali," sobbed the old woman, "when dat pore man waked np dis iuornin he found hisself dead."—New York Tribune. He—My dear friend, have yon read my last novel. She—Yes. He—How did you like it? She—I laid down the volume with intense pleasure.—Truth. Tlie Genial Car Driver. They smoked a pipe together, and the understanding was complete. Mist Joy Never Bills. d-:ir grandson." said the loving x as she gently stroked the ir. "I find my sight is fail-1 fe:ir that ere long I shall to Iniit the socks which Co r» during the Smith—A new motor for increasing the speed of horse cars has been discovered.• Arthur Dc Lille rapidly grew from convali:sconce to robust health. lie walked, wrestled i.nd ran with the young braves. lii« great height being of much advantage to him. li is'education in the school of the athletes and in fencing anii shooting in Paris now became of greSl service to him.' With returning health he developed great physical power, the fudians were proud of him. he was their equal in most sports, their superior in many "Afflictions inav lDe ) a. How cumulative. ' | b. Why cumulative. i a. How disciplinary. ''( b. Why disciplinary. !a. How corrective, 1D. Why corrective. a. How tentative. b. Why tentative. Etc. Etc." Jones—Has it? Well, the horse cars D'on't need it up my way. All I have to lo to increase the speed of the cars is to signal to the driver with my umbrella that I want to get on board.—Texas Sittings. boy's fair i and 1 I. Cumulative. ingme, and I feel that I should lia own the n. Disciplinary 1 ha t vol In her presence. Melodramatic-nil. But I have I A Wonderful Memory, Bnlfineh—Miss Smilax has simply a wonderful memory. 1 gave him a pass, as I would any one who belongs to our honored profession, but. as Little Emily's uncle would say, if 1 know the meaning of anything he said to me whatever, may I be gormed. tancous one of the shoulders and hip: III. Corrective, and as she passed there was a sound of stilt—swish, swi'ih. ■Ob. d iiDit my w\ my dear grandsclaiined tlw yonng man in a outburst «ih the light of a roke over his face. "This is too much. 1 cannot bear it."— Clothier and Furnisher. first met Mabel. I tlioujjlit I knew it ill But slie knew lictier. .rned few tLiatr since I Wooden—Why, what proof lias shf iven of it? IV. Tentative.. Etc. "I bet that U a New Yorker she got the silk walk down to a fin point?" said the taller and darker of the two girls. ir-n't mother." C A Feminine Reareli Dy lir Among the other things that I lia learned Bol finCh—Why, I lier :it n suppei hist night, and she not only remindec me about our being engaged last snui liter, but gave me a number of the details—Boston Courier. At Saunders, N. (J., the other day we found a new thing in the way of eating houses. Saunders is a station where two rival roads meet and shako their fists at each other. If one road has a train arriving in the morning, the other road has a train that arrives late in the evening to connect with it. This gives the traveler an opportunity to view the town of Saunders, .which is composed largely of climate. 7c Bibbs—How de do. Bob? Where's sis? Bob (sis' husband)—Gone shopping. "What did she want?" "Nothing." Comrient loudness. Is the fact things. i'M That a solitaire rint» that cost one hun- As the time approached for his decision, f)e Lille went to the old war- "What do you mean by silk "Why." Alice, haven't you noticed the way all the tfirls are walking now. and that lovely rustling sound?" y y/i mi / 'YHh II *iiil (lrttl sUininu Can be sold by a C u riled lover "Then why did she go shopping?" rior and said Illuxfrntrd Plir**n. For a_mlaera ihirt •"Mnlty on his plates," I am told by Mr. Irving, is a racing term and means unsteady on his feet. "To see if she could find anything that vrould make her want something."— New York Weekly. "He Li!l:D wants to pro into retreat for three days to consider his decisionlie wants to b: alone, to consider the future, to consult the Grrat Spirit." However, the t iiirty come in Ami if 1 may liut have .Mabel I may at least Have De Dinks—One good tiling about Minks. Although lie's ;i great borrower, he always pays promptly. He was in only a few moments ago and paid me the ten dollars he owed me. A I'ruinpt Payer. "Oil, pshaw; anybody c:in who has a siltc foundation skirts." xa that — £ «;A "one plunk house," Mr. Irving assures me. is a dollar-a-day house. The "onjenew," he says, is one who plays the part of a pure young girl who never had an evil thought. E. W. N. to her -tr My watch again. Thank Heaven! All "De faille speaks wisely. It shall be so. So one shali speak to thee, to ask anything of thee for three days." "Indeed they can't, then. Your dress is made upon silk, and I can't hear a sound. No; you've got to hava on a silk lining and a silk petticoat, too. I was wild for one. and when I found I couldn't afford it—they were twenty and thirty dollars- I almost cried, until I thoughtof an old silk drr»ss I liad, and I've got it on now. Hut tliey don't make a bit of noise unless you wriggle Logical. Teacher—Bobby, where do we get our sugar? Is not lost De Winks—Humph! He was into my place abont an hour ago and borrowed twenty dollars of me.—New York Weekly. A tlirifty gentleman, realizing the needsof this active little town, has established an eating works. The distinguishing characteristic of this place consists of a large circular table, the outer rim of which is stationary; the inner table, or center, containing the eatables, mustard pot, embalmed cockroaches and pie, revolves upon its axeltree, so that while your plate remains where it was originally put, the principal articles of indigestion may be obtained by taking hold of the revolving table and swinging it around till you get what you are after. Elizabeth (N. J.) Town Tattle, Bobby—From the sugar cane. Teacher—Correct. Now, Edward, w here do we get our soap? Edward—From the soapstone?—Rochester Poet-Express. It was so ordered. He took his gun M All til*- !f«flats III iiliKllAil A Screw l oose Somewhere. and went to the top of a mountain, and there considered his situation. He reviewed the civilized savages of France. de«strovin£r everything that was goon. '1 hen he turned to the peaceful civilization of the savages going on around him and thought of what he should lose, nay, had lost, in France; then of the life of toil and labor before him; then of its freedom—the joyous, wild life of tlic Indian. V\ b-- IS" IjJR, •=D Ono of otir fasliionabl ceived quiti- fi shock to his aesthetic senses the other evening. lit' was informed that he was wanted in his study, '.chere he found a young man and woman from the rural districts waiting to pr-e him. clergyman re- Kingley—Say. old man, 1 have a great scheme for getting ahead of my wife, and it may do you some good. 1 go to her dressmaker and tell her to charge twice as much as she ordinarily would. Then 1 stand in for the difference, and mv wife don't dare buy half the gowns she otherwise would. He Got His Autograph. Jl Alexandre Dumas fils (lined one day with Dr. Glstal, one of the mast popular and eminent physicians in Marseilles. After dinner the company adjourned to the drawing room, where coffee war served. Here Gistal said to his honored Miss Fitzosro ».tk! bo a goo'l bo}-! -Well, goodby.Percivsti, Slight Delay. your knees, a sort of corkscrew motion like this." Clara—1 thought yon wero to go walk tag with Miss Grosgrain today? Didn't she have a new walking costume just from Paris? Percival (a very good boy, who lias jnRt been specially warned not to make personal remarks about people in tbeir presence)—Good by. I'll not tell nurse what I think rf your nose till you're gone.—George Du Mauriu- in London Punsh. "Good evening 'what can I do fD said courteously And the taller and darker of tlie two girls wriggled her way down the avenue so successfully and with such a rustle of silk that an old colored woman put down her basket of clothes and gazed after h:r. saying1: "You tell, Jemimy nudging the girl. guest Bingo— Yes, I tried that plan. Kingley—How did it work? Bingo—The dressmaker is suing me for the full amount.—Cloak Review. Maude—Yes. But her dressmaker says it won't bo done until tomorrow.— Cloak Review. "No, you tell, Sim," she giggled back. "We've come to get hitched,"" paid the man bashfully. "My dear Dumas, I know you are a capital hand at improvising. Pray oblige me with four lines of your own composing here in this album." "With pleasure," the author replied. He took his pencil and wrote: Fur tlie health and well being of our dear old town He thought how he had boea snatched from death at home; how he had suffered in New York and since; how now by this Indian woman lie had been brought from death to life, and he looked up to the Great Spirit and prayed: "Direct me in all my doings with Thy most gracious favor and further me with Thy continual help." Then he laid down to rest and think. For three days he continued the medications that were to fix a life, and at length rose from "the ground rejoicing in a psalm of praise: "J am an Indian," he said. "I thank. Thee, Father, for 'this revelation of Thy wilL" This works very well so long as there is a friendly feeling among the guests, but the other evening there was a general soreness on the part of those who gathered around this festive boafd, a sort of strained and bitter feeling, growing no doubt out of the Unfriendly relations between the two roads and their unfortunate connections, so that while one guest on the lee side of the table wanted something out of the caster, which was on the starboard, and started the festive board to revolve at a rapid rate, another gentleman on the lee quarter decided that he also would like to open a bottle of vinegar, so that just as the caster got to the first named gentleman the table was given another whirl and the air was filled with victuals, gravy and gloom. _ "W-li-a-tV" ejaculated the surprised clergyman. "1 really don't understand yon, my friend." A Successful Hunt. "Dat young lady sat'nly gwine to tear dat dress ter pieres ef she don't walk mo' stiddy." —Washington Post A«iDlrntionii. Ills Great Mistake. She (after the ball)—Has papa asked you about j-our income? He—Yes. Cholly—Aw! what success did yon have on your hunting expedition, Fweddy, deah boy? Did you kill any gatne? 1 Mi jm As the man sut dumb the girl ventured timidly: , Fweddy—No, bau Jove! But deuce take it, we killed four of the hunting dogs.—Truth. —Lived in Boston, of Course.—Hides —"They tell me that Crown's wife is quite literary." Wicks—"Decidedly, bhe's writing letters from morning to night, and when Bhe buys a new article of furniture she makes sure that it corresponds with everything else in the house."—Boston Transcript ji / J Dr. CiHlul ]ia9 always lDeen anxious—very. Result: The hospital is now pulled down, "Yon flatterer!" the doctor interrupted, as he was looking over the writer's shoulder. But Dumas went on: And In its p'ace we've a cemetery. —Figaro Illnstre. She—And you told him that littlo fib about the largo salary? He—Yes. She—I'm so glad. A SHOUT TRAMP AFTER rDID.'\'!:!t. —Harper's Bazar. "He moans, Fir. that we want to get spliced "I'm ns lurch in the dirk as o' said the now bewildered minister; ' yon kimlly expTiiiii'."* The man scratched his head. "We thought, Jeuiimy an me, get tied." rer."' #»* T»an1c«*r Did. wiil lie—Well, I'm sorry. He borrowed fifty dollars from me on the spot.— Smith, Gray & Co.'s Monthly. Progress and roverty. A l»ani-pr le talking to one of his Poker is a reform game. The players are constantly going better.—Binghamton Republican. Arthur, a man never ants to much in this life until lie lerks, said gate married we'd Not Satisfied The mind tlius made up is fixed forever, and it was so with De Lille, He now sought the accomplishment of his purpose with avidity. ;0n his way home be sooke to every one he met, "There's n man in Baltimore wlio is the Incky possessor of Benjamin Franklin's watch." Out ITeroded TTerod. "I tbink po myself, sir," the young man replied. Still the minister aid nut compj and Jemima took her tuiri. hend Butcher (to artist)—I am not quite satisfied with tho portrait. The right side of the chest should bulge Bomewhat— that is where I keep my pocketbook.— Fliegendo Blatter. Worth thinking Of. Customer—Isn't that a pretty good price for n porous plaster? Druggist—Yes, but just think how lonn It will last—New York Sua, , A Postponed Trip. Cabbie—I understand that you lost the steamer for Europe. Stone—Yes. My wife had to go back for another hairpin.—Cloak Review. "Glad you are po ready to witfc ine, Arthnr, for I have taken qufee r liking to you. Hotv- old are you?" "I say, m".m, yon don't know of do one who wants n nr.rse to take care of jronr children, do yon?"—Life. "We've come tobC- jined "That's nothing. I know a man who hss Adim's apple,"—Jewelers' Circular. "Ah, I understand—excuse me," said the minister, on whom the lijrht o{ _ s* M T M*m