Pittston Gazette

              D ™t«u"SII!iir'f Oldest KewsDaDer in the Wyoming Valley.* PITTSTON, LUZERNE CO., PA., FRIDAY, OCTOBER 10, 1890. A WeeJdy Local and Family Journal A nnfi i nil AF! Ill imil i The pastor continued for another half 1 nn r/lliHIlli H 11 1 H hour 111 strain. warning his hearers A "llliliUli 1/1 1 ill 111 5n th® mo8t impressive language that they could not learn the English language or hold intercourse with Americans without running a grave risk of eternal damnation. He elaborated his theme with great ingenuity and ended with an appeal for the endowment of a parochial school under the direct supervision and control of the Norwegian Lutheran synod. He finished this appeal with a long and fervid prayer, in which he besought God to save his people from the abominations of desolation —from the unhallowed and soul destroying dance around the Golden Calf, which was, forsooth, the god of the heretical, mammon worshiping nation wherewith it had pleased him to surround them. The meeting was then at an end, and the pastor devoted himself for another hour to private solicitation, buttonholing one by one the well to do members of the churr-h, and refusing to let them go until they had pledged themselves in writing for an amount which he thought fair. If any one, knowing that his torn would come next, tried to steal away unobserved the zealous clergyman dexterously intercepted him, and shamed him with appeals to his pride and his fear until he had contributed his quota. When he approached the Widow Matson, who had made no attempt to escape, Gunnar thought with fear and trembling that now "he was in for it" He was therefore astonished when the pastor grasped his hard and cracked fist in his soft, moist hand, and asked with a kind of harsh friendliness how he was getting on. The boy was afraid to commit himself on so ticklish a subject and looked up into his mother's face, as if expecting her to answer. "Oh, God help us, Mr. Pastor," the widow replied, "he isn't getting on at all. The spirit of the world, the flesh and the devil is strong in him. He does not think of God, Mr. Pastor, but only of quarreling and sinful fooling and deviltry." letter was received, and Martha took it for granted that her husband was dead. She had tried to institute inquiries, advertised for him in the Scandinavian paper, etc., but with no results. Several j settlers had proposed for her hand during this time, but though she regarded herself as a widow she had refused all offers. A large settlement had grown up about her, and in a circuit of twenty or thirty miles the country was largely in possession of Norwegians. They did all in their power to keep out other nationalities from their immediate neighborhood, and vented particularly their hostility on the Irish if a representative of that race dug a hole in the ground, and staked out a homestead on land which they had reserved for the occupation of their brethren in the faith. German Protestants they tolerated, though they were far from liking them, but the community of religion restrained them from active hostilities. And, moreover, the Germans were no less clannish than the Norsemen themselves—congregating in communities of their own, and rarely from choice encroaching upon Scandinavian precincts. In the meanwhile a church had been built—*, simple, frame structure, and about as ugly as could have been devise—and a clergyman had been called over from Norway. An ex-theological student named Salveson, formerly addicted to drink, but now ostensibly reformed, roamed about the country, giving instruction of an antiquated sort in reading, writing, arithmetic and Bible history. He was an odd stick—atypical wreck of the kind the old world is continually contributing to the new, but for all his failings he was well received wherever he went, and had free board apd lodging ad libitum on any Norse farm he chose to visit. When he retired with a black bottle or two to some remote spot people let him alone, and received him on his return after two or three days with undiminished cordiality. He was not in the best condition for teaching Bible history on such occasions; but then, in a new country where scholars were scarce, no one could afford to be exacting. He was, to be sure, very young, but not too young to feel a vague perturbation of his blood at the sight of a pretty girl. The great thing was to get him securely anchored, and as an anchor for a restless disposition she knew nothing that availed except a wife and children. REVISING THE CENSUS. identity, and assert on oath that my vitals are constantly exposed to the night air, and my finer feelings are liable at any moment to fall out and be appropriated by others. I did so state to the commissioner of pensions, who replied in a flippant way, referring me to the bureau of vital statistics, and stating that a friend of his had just perfected an awning to be worn over such apertures to keep the works of those who had been bored into in that way from getting freckles on them. hands. Stockton, acting on his information, sent out a column to meet Keartiy, but had it not been for Carson, with his indomitable spirit, the Junction of forces might never have taken place, and the establishment of United States authority on the ooast must have been indefinitely delayed. All the cattle in Kearny's camp had been lost in the fight, and his men were reduced to mule meat. Pico had a large force completely surrounding the American position. At the end of four days' siege matters were desperate for Kearny, and he determined to try issue with his enemies, desperate as the undertaking seemed. Everything was put in readiness, the baggage was destroyed, the wounded and sick placed on stretchirsand the little caravan stretched itself mfe in shape to show which route they " Suddenly ther " in KIT CAKSON'S EXPLOITS. artyifls J31"£D BILL NYE GIVE8 SOME RESULTS STORIES OF THE FAMOUS HUNTER, tyUALMAB HJOBTH BOYESEH. OF HIS EXPURGATORY LABORS. SCOUT AND GUIDE. [Copyright All rights referred.] Gunnar, though he had no suspicion of his mother's plans, was insensibly drawn in the direction of her wishes. About a mile from his home lived a Norwegian farmer named Paul Gretna, who had a daughter named Ingerid. She was about Gunnar's age, or perhaps a year younger, and had a reputation for beauty. She was a soft, dimpled little creature, with affectionate blue eyes, a fresh infantine face and a rosy complexion. It was difficult to tell from that face what manner of woman she might grow to be; but it was fair to infer thai she would make a comfortable wife and a good mother. She was a blonde and attractive personification of her sex; and that is, after all, what most men wanl their wives to be. A too distinct indi viduality is often an element of disturb ance. Ha 8»ji He Occasionally Ban* Across In Battle with the Copper Colored Brave* of the West—A Friend In Need. With Gen*. Fremont and Kearny—la the Civil War. (CONTINUED ) An Impure Thought Among the Other- CHAPTER L wise Immaculate Returns and Offers There was a prayer meeting at Lars Steensrud's farm. The sitting room was crowded with people, and all around the open windows eager listeners were standing, straining their ears to catch the words that fell from the preacher's lips. A current of foul, moist air, charged with the odor of human exhalations, poured out into the hallway where men and women stood packed together like herring in a barrel Outside in the farm yard some small boys, now and thea forgetting the solemnity of the occasion, fell to punching and teasing each other, and were sternly rebuked by their elders as soon as their altercations became audible. Half a dozen young girts in calico gowns and colored ksrchiefs on their hearts made » feint of listening to the fervid discount «f which a phrase now and then reached them, but watched furtively the unregenerate behavior of the boys, and snickered whenever one got the better of the other. One or Two Samples to the Public. [Copyright by Edgar W. Nye.] [Copyright by American Press Association.) agree that no My thanks are due to the printer for advance sheets, promptly received, of a little brochure entitled "The Literary Side of the Census," the receipt, or recipe, rather, of which is hereby gratefully acknowledged. "So I have mortgaged my place, thinking it was perfectly safe to do so, and that a beneficent government would listen to my sorrows and pity my great misfortune. But the surplus has came and it has went away, and I am left here on my mortgaged farm, trying to raise the mortgage with one hand and hold my pancreas in with the other, while you people at Washington, full of fun, good victuals and high purposes, sit there on the woolsack, as it were, ready to burst with ill concealed laughter every time I display my wound. this era fitly reprebe spirit carved out -ys to the and made the » m M - —aimed to go. uj there appeared «e" a hmty corps of Pico's Mexican lane . rL® e ***D which moved into line along the road of civilixar selected by Kearny sad stolidly awaited han the fa*xDrder heoro To go forward would meJs, surrender or .arson, the annihilation. A council was called and *i°th® W**situation was discussed. Should the Path- it be surrender or a light to the death? Beforeithe Many, even the suffering sick and wodadg of Fi» ed, preferred the latter, for Mexicans, parson had when their fierce passions are aroused, can his days in be as savage and cruel as Indians. The pplng and only alternative was relief from Stockton, hunting n New and than w«e beliend to be insurmoun£ le and in Sacra- able obstacles In the way of that. But at length the spirit of devoted heroism arose led this life, but as a silver lining to the cloud that hung his family. His like a pall over that beleaguered, starving t i bMd* A yoaB* nddshipman, a mere boy, alls to the lot of who had ooms oat from Stockton's camp i, and in In the first party, offered to point out the prowess way to Ban Diego if "Kit" Carson wbuld were highly go with him aa a bearer of tidings. Kearny at once demurred, and said that Caison could not be spared from the counjndidlyj.ead, but away like pursuers into baa 2r Canon was VjH Bs~.. A ■ when he saw fifty warriors drawn ll ; t~L way, he rushed at them Se had a regiment at but three men. The ead, and the Indians kit caebon. iat they did not eOs of the camp in the crisis of that hour, riders were well Then the boy, Beale, an- Tit" and his men swered that no other could aid and force of the vol- Carson himself pleaded to be allowed to which took effect, aeeomnany the brave fellow. Kearny soon beyond rifle yielded, and they set out at dark, with difchat the ambush was Acuity passing Gen. Pico's double rows of campaign arranged to pickets on the hillside and a patrol eft and another band mounted lancers on the plain- These pre".ould unite, and cautions of the enemy had been taken. es— " had saved the pedally to prevent lost such a movement -mp from annihilation. aa this communication with Stockton. - occasion Carson displayed The California general's orders on posting readiness and courage in saving his guards had bees, "Be alert, Carson is one man at the peril of his own. there.'' p"M»| to the Aovr|waMit6W; wis trapping in the Yellowstone, the hilL He had learned from theflrst given much trouble by the In- messengers from the camp whom he hatf ------ themselves in captured, that the redoubtable scout and yof a village, gtdde was with Kearny. And with "Kit" at In order to move with secrecy Carson ., the midst of the and Beale removed their shoes, and in paas.ors, killing several at the first charge, lag Pico's wary sentinels they crawled but Indians, however, recovered from their an inch at a ttmd. The task was so dim-, and made a stubborn fight, coming cult that at ones Beale urged Canon a quarters that the trappen to give it Bp. "Let us jump out oa them __ the nsaot thalr pistols, JbM- fM jtot.facHJs all Oyer with ua," ne were outfought, and began the eaid. Carson answered, "No; I have beenin gallop. In the mad flight wone places and Providence served me." s and its rider waa caught At last they passed the standing pickets, it felL Immediately a and then crawled over the two miles of dends rushed forward la a plain, whioh waa guarded by mounted trapper's scalp. "Kit" was petrel. This they passed, sad then day "*y, his horse tearing along came on. During the day they hid in a Seeing the straits of moantafa gorge, aad on the following night onder a mountain struck Pioo'a pickets around Stockton's foes howling cloee camp. They now separated and eluded emptying his rifle ever, waa so exhansted that Stockton's and bringing him nien had to carry him from the outposts ot, the remaining to the esmp. Stockton at onee sent imprisoned trap- oat a strong party to meet Kearny, and the delicate mission, thanks to Carson's Carson coolness and pluck, was accomplished. at Fort In the civil war Carson commanded the way. visit his old First New Maxloo volunteers, and the same D when he met the characteristics him in tha -lis first expedition army that he displayed la the exploring once engaged as gnlda. aad huatlag camps. At the battle-of Vatin his memoirs, do- verde, in New Mexico, he crossed the Eio meeting, that he waa of Grande with his regiment, and attacking broad shouldered and boldly waa gaining the day when sodden clear, steady blue eye orders came to retreat across the river. In address." Us report Carson offered ao protest, but said that his rqgimentwaa sweeping everything before it when it was called off. In person Carson was a simple minded, WniWn laan. He made nothing of himelf; his career is written indelibly where relived and wrought. A tribute to hii memory published la The Salt Lake uae closss with these words, which . Indicate his niche la history: "He followed the water courses to their sources, and guided by them learned when the mountains bent their crests to main - ~r . possible highways for the feet ot men. Ha nother of the climbed the mountains sad 'disputed with : horses and tha aagles of ths crags' for points of obmercy of the serration; he met the wild beast and subD grief "Kit" dued him; he met the savage of the plains rescue their and of the bills, and ia Us own person r, Richard gave notice of his sovereignty in akiU, in ind in a cunning and in courage. To the red man he was the vote of fate." GEO. L. KIT.mkr. It is a little volume of less than 200 pages, neatly printed by the government, I think. It is going to be a rapid seller and a great boon. It is compiled from answers on file at the Census bureau mainly regarding the interrogatories issued by consent and connivance of government relating to incumbrances on property and other private matters. The publication of the book reveals for the first time the true reason for these compulsory answers. Acting fcpon the hint already given by thrifty publishers and syndicates, who write to eminent people occasionally asking them how they earned their first money and whether they have it yjet, and if so, whether they would be willing to loan some of it, etc., the bureau has its drawers now full of statistics, as one might say, and with no cost at all is going to issue this book as soon as I have looked it over carefully and done some expurgating. Mr. Wanamaker says he will cheerfully put it on his bargain counter if I will go through it carefully and see that it is pure. "WHY DOES EVERYBODY LAUGH AT ME." that there wasn't more than enough for the officers. "That night the liquor was stored in an old tobacco barn that stood on a side hill, and the commissary took charge of it. Pardon my going into detail this way, but when I see a bureau just panting for private information I like to load it up, and only wish that the American people would join me in this praiseworthy endeavor. "Dog on such a government, I say, and I say it fearless, too. Who cares a tinker's mill site for mirth and multiplication tables and mpan temperature and the mortality among microbes when folks are suffering on every hand? You seem to think you are saving the great ship of state by asking me to state on oath that I am in debt, and not only gratify the idle and venomous curiosity of your old senseless burro that hasn't been able yet to count a single town correct since I knew it, but then you must also come and ask me to swear to my shame, and make oath publicly to my tottering credit Gunnar was, indeed, not the only one who had discovered Ingerid's attractiveness. His old friend and antagonist, Thorsten Sletten, with whom he had fought at the prayer meeting, was » frequent visitor at the Gretna farm, ai were also half a dozen other lads, whc made no attempt to disguise their ad miration for the daughter of the house. Mexico,on the YeLlowato mento valley. It was not instinct, however, that he as a means of support for experience was attended ger and excitement that  a pioneer in a savage wilderness, this way the latent boldness - " of a naturally modest nature developed. "The liquor was extremely rocky, 1 guess; but that's neither here nor there. The silence of night gathered about the sleeping encampment, and tired nature soon yielded to overpowering fatigue. All was silence along the misty line of slumbering forms, save the near by crunching and grinding of provender by the jaded horses or the distant report as some faithful picket discharged his duty. "Oh, ye-generation of vipers," shouted the preacher in a terrific voice of warning and menace, "who shall teach you to . flee from the wrath to come?' The boys, supposing the admonition was addressed to them, grew quite alarmed; and seating themselves on a log in front of the wood shed, in various awkward attitudes, glanced at each other with a half cowed and shame faced bravado. Bot they, presently forgot their scare, and then commenced anew the same punching and pinching and challenging brag which led to fresh quarrels. "I know where there is a skunk," said Thorsten Sletten, a tow headed, freckled and chunky lad of 18. They come every Sunday afternoon after service, hung about the fences and the walls of the outhouses, pushed and punched each other, laughed uproariously wnen somebody stumoiea or reii, and behaved with a sort of coltish sprightliness which was calculated tc exhibit them in a favorable light in tht eyes of Ingerid Gretna. Gunnar, though he fp11 ;inSelf above indulging in this horo iy, did not dare to forfeit his popularity by holding aloof. It flattered him to observe that he was regarded by all as having the best chance; and he had to keep a steady watch on himself, lest he should offend by betraying the confidence he felt. For Paul Gretna had made more than one visit to hit mother of late, and Gunnar had a suspicion that the matter had already been talked over and virtually settled between them. At all events, he imagined he detected something vaguely paternal in Paul's attitude toward him, as if h« thought it unnecessary to feign ignorance of his intentions. But on such occasions Gunnar drew back aa if afraid It is hardly to be expected that a mai whose modesty is extolled on all side* would have a history filled with the most daring exploits. Yet Bach is the case with Carson, and the deeds he was capable oi may be illustrated by one of his brat earlj ones. While trapping on the LaramiC river with a party they were much an noyed by Indians, and adopted the tacti' of opening battle on sight. Once "F and three companions were explorir beavers, when they were confront four red men in war paint sp' mounted. The trappers dashed r the Indians wheeled and sped lightning, leading their rash a cleverly arranged ambush. at the head of his party, and the trap, and some c" up along the patk as boldly as though his back instead o others followed hi/ "Go to! you old intellectual pus cavity! Go home, you old Stirling ass, and put a bread-and-milk poultice on your morbid curiosity. Get out! Avaunt! and don't waste any time about it Go home and tell your folks to bar the door when they see the fatigued Washington fool killer coming. Tell them I said so!" "Then all was silent again. My esteemed contemporary, the editor of The Congressional Record, has gone through it. but in a slightly cursory manner, I think, and quite a number of impure thoughts have escaped his eagle eye—thoughts which of course might be permitted in a deliberative body, but not in the mails. Those who have happened to be in the postal car on a hot day when an impure thought was in transit will agree with the writer that it ought to be stopped, especially during the crowded seasons, when the mails are Already overtaxed with their burden of lottery business. "Anon the day breaks, and with it a wild, mellow howl from Company G, known as the Sparkling-and-bright-in-itsliquid-light company; also the teetotlers. This was calculated to be sarcastic, because they had painted every southern state a bright red barring Texas, and that was too big for their stock, so they run out of paint. "I am sorry to hear such bad reports of yon, Gunnar," observed the pastor with a warning shake of the head. "He actually fought ddring the meeting," the mother continued; "fought with fists till blood flowed." She made an effort to get hold of the boy's left hand, which he now discovered was quite tyoody. But the delinquent thrust it guiltily into his pocket and made an effort to retire behind his ir.Tiber's back. She talked on for ».oine minutes, lamenting his wickedness, not. however, in the usnal whining voice of a complaining Wbman, but in a tone of stern accusation. She scarcely observed that the pastor's replies showed but a faint interest in the subject, and that he was more than once on the point of interrupting her. "Well, well, my good woman," he broke in impatiently, "we'll talk more about that another time. What I came to ask you about concerns, however, your boy very closely. How much are you willing to contribute to the Bchool which we are about to found, where youths of our church can be brought up in accordance with the true Lutheran faith?" "I am a widow, pastor, and earn in the sweat of my brow the pittance which we require to keep body and soul There are others, many others, that are of interest, but space will not permit of any farther at this time. I shall no doubt, in my work of expurgating, find others which may bo published in the press in the future. "I saw a drunk man yesterday," observed Gunnar Matson, promptly accepting the challenge. He was a tall, handsome youth of 14, whose coat sleeves and trousers were much too short for him. "My father has a cousin who is in jail," retorted Thonten, determined not to be beaten "Well, these fellers were all extremely full, and they went on to state that they were glad of it. They had been heard to speak disparagingly of the rebellion several times, and to say also that if they were home again they would be almost willing to let the colored man break his own fetlocks in snch style as he might deem proper. They said a great many things about the inconvenience of being chased and shot at for two days running by an infuriated foe at $13 per month and find one's self. Widow Matson, who was anxious to have her son profit by Salveson's accomplishments, induced him to stay for months at a time at her farm, and kindly overlooked his periodical disappearances and his demoralized aspect when he crawled forth again to resume ms laoors, It was enough for hef that the pastor indorsed Salveson, who in spite of his unhappy proclivities was perfectly orthodox, and truly and purely Lutheran. Gunnar, on the other hand, was inclined to take a critical view of him, but found his instruction, on the whole, amusing. Salveson always smoked a long pipe when he taught, and his rubicund nose gleamed through the smoke while he spoke of Norway's past glory and the great deeds of the Vikings. Often he grew quite excited, scratched his tousled head and wiped away the tears that trickled down his cheeks. If I could have my way I would have appointed by the president a large committee of mind readers, to have general supervision of the United States, and the moment any person was detected having an impure thought the committee should have power to hit him back of the ear with a club and take him before the cadi. The time is surely coming when the now lawless think retort of the great thinking world will have to become subservient to the laws of the land. This will be general at that time. People who have surreptitiously thought damn for centuries will be brought up and exposed. It will astonish a good many, I think. It will create a complete panic. No one bnt the dignified and non-committal idiot will be safe. But I fear that I am digressing. were so dumfonnded that fire a shot until the r* abreast of them. Then *' sheered off, breaking tht ley, only two shots of and the trappers wen range. It turned out only a part of a ca destroy Carson's party of trappers before thej thus the boldness of "Ki whole trappers' cam- On another ~ his great the life of His part; and wen "But my father killed a man in Norway," cried Gunnar triumphantly. "That's a lie in your throat." "It is no such thing." In a flash they had both tumbled down from the log, grappled, and, swaying to and fro, fought like tigers. The other boys, wholly oblivious of the prayer meeting, yelled with delight and shouted P. S.—I already have a very flattering offer for the use of such replies to the census as I may think best to expurgate. B. N. to commit himself. For in the background of his mind he liked to keep a little loophole in case he should, after all, conclude to start out in the world in quest of glory. "Later on we ascertained that the liquor had been secured by incendiaries, who had stolen two barrels out of three, and almost out from under our noses. This very naturally infuriated our officers, who had had only- one or two big drinks out of it so far, preferring to wait a day or two in order that it would have more age. I tasted of it myself once, so I was told by friends who held my head all the day afterward. I couldn't help thinking at the time that if this sort of liquor was general in the south, piracy, treason and the use of cuspidors in the sanctuary ought not to be looked upon so severely as they would where a less malignant style of rum was in general circulation. This was the condition of things at the time when the farmer Lars Randideven invited his neighbors to celebrate his wedding with Karen Holtsrud. It was a large wedding, and both Gunnai ind his mother and Ingerid and her parents received invitations. The pastor married the couple in the church at uoon, and abont forty vehicles of all sorts accompanied them to the bridal house. All the picturesque customs which in Norway makes such an occasion memorable had been dropped; but a master of ceremonies there was, who welcomed the bride and groom and proposed their health at the feast that followed. Beer flowed abundantly at the table, and whisky was poured from pocket flasks which were passed about from hand to hand with a mock pretense of secrecy. The pastor, who sat next to the bride at the head of the table, was so deeply absorbed in the eatables, to which he did full justice, that he affected not to see the dangerous bottles that circulated under his very noee. As it happened Gunnar found himself next to a city clad stranger in black broadcloth, resplendent with a gold watch (which he frequently consulted) and rings and watch chain of the same metal. This man turned out to be a near relative of the groom and a prosperous grocer in Chicago. His name was Hans Larson, but in order to propitiate the native ear he changed it to John Lawson. And what was more, he wore a mustache, with a smart twist at the ends, and a shiny silk hat. His square face showed the Norse peasant type plainly enough, but the expression had been sharpened, showing a shrewdness and wide awake enterprise which are rarely found in the original. SAW A TRAIN COMING. The Thrilling Tale of a Man on ■ Railroad Bridge. The train was passing over a high trestle work on an Ohio railroad when a man who had been smoking his cigar in silence suddenly observed : "Ah! gentlemen, but I have cause to remember this spot all my life." "Anything happen to you here?' asked one of the quartet. encouragement to the combatants, while the girls on the steps faced about quickly and strove no more to disguise their interest Even the devout people about the windows began to gravitate slowly toward the scene of the conflict, and a vague sense of the disturbance communicated itself within the sitting room, where the penitents began to look back over their shoulders and ceased to follow the discourse. diana. One day, finding some strength In the vicinity they decided to attack, - ' the head dashed lntr warriors  Theh." surpriseto such clow were driven then they v retreat at a a hone was shot, beneath it as dozen painted race for the some distance away at a breakneck pace. his comrade, struggling weight, with his savage 1 at hand, he flung himself wheeled and ran back, at the foremost Indian  to earth. Others were shot, warriors recoiled, and the' per was set free. After his trapping experience* spent eight years as the hunter Bent He was on his ' to home in New Mextft Pathfinder, bound on in 1842. He was at Fremont says of hin scribing this first "medium height, deep che&ted, with a and frank speech and  He remained with Fremont through the first expedition, and at the express request of the explorer joined the second one. This was through Utah and to the Great Salt Lake. On the return toward the statea they took the Spanish trail, and one day a Mexican, accompanied by a lad, came to the explorers' camp with a touching tale of wrong at the hands of the Indians. They were Mexican traders, aad had been attacked with their friends and had escaped with their lives, leaving the wife o/ the man and the father and w " " ' boy, together with a band of valuable goods, at the m savages. Touched by their volunteered to go and help friends. Another mountaineer, Godey, accompanied him, an  short time they struck the trail leading through a desert. The boy was sent back to camp, and soon' the elder Mexican's horse gave out and he turned back, leaving Carson and Godey to pursue thel' chiva * "— — — prisea "Thank God on your knees that you were born a Norseman, boy," he would say, "for he might just as well have made you a miserable Deutschman or Englishman or American. We are the proudest nation on earth, or we ought to be, if we would read our history aright There wasn't anybody could lick those old Vikings. They conquered Normandy, a mere handful of them, and when the king of France wanted Duke Hollo to kiss his confounded toe—think of it he, a Norseman, kiss a Frenchman's toe—Rollo simply took him by the foot and quietly turned him upside down. Served him right, the fool I And when they had gobbled up France these Veiy same fellows—or I think it was their grandchildren—sailed over and put England in their pockets. Ho! hot That was a neat job, wasn't it?" « "Indeed something happened. It was two years ago this month. I was visiting my aunt in that hamlet at the other end. One day I wanted to come over to the big stone quarry, a quarter of a mile farther on. It was a near cut to take the track, and so I took it." The book above referred to embodies some odd information regarding indebtedness, and sheds light at times incidentally on some points not embodied in the census regulations and not contemplated by the act authorizing the taking of the census. I will give a few of these replies bearing on the mortgaged condition of property and the reasons therefor, carefully eliminating names and residences. This flattering attention spurred the boys to do their best They pulled each other's hair and ears, planted blow upon blow in each other's foreheads, tried to together." "The widow's mite, you remember, was particularly acceptable in the eyes of our Lord," said the pastor with unction."hook" each other's legs, and resorted to all the dodges recognized in the art of self defense. But they were pretty evenly matched, Thorsten making up in brawn what he lacked in size. They were yet in the midst of the fierce struggle, and both heroically determined not to give up when suddenly a tall, "Well, to make a long story short, Mr. Census Burro, I was selected to guard the remaining barrel that night. I pnt it tip on a trestle, locked the doors and laid down alongside the trestle in my blankets and waited for day. I kept awake for probably an hour, though it seemed to me like a year. Then the crickets sounded further and further away, and that was all, for I was tired. Oh, sir, I was indeed very tired. I wasn't doing regular guard duty, recollect, Burro, but sort of volunteer police duty. "And met a train!" exclaimed a voice. "Tee, I had reached the center of the trestle, which is ninety-five feet above the cruel rocks, when I heard the whistle of a locomotive, and a moment later caught sight of a freight train rounding the curve. There was only one possible way of escape." There was no gainsaying such an argument. and after a moment's hesitation the widow pledged herself for But she could not be persuaded to promise to send her boy to the school; first, because he was not to be trusted away from her, and secondly, because she needed his help on the farm. CHAPTER IL One man who writes a very poor hand says: "I have mortgaged my place for $900 to a neighbor of mine in order to give my daughter good schooling and accomplish her so as she could do well. She learnt to eat pie with a fork and play 'The Maiden's Prayer' on the piano, and then married what's called an aeronaut. He made an ascension last spring, and they didn't find him till last Fourth of July, when s brother of his'n made an ascension at the same place, and when he come down he discovered my son-in-law in a tree. He reckonued him before he seen him, he said. The widow and children are stopping at home now along with me and mother. I will lift the mortgage as soon as I can if you will keep this to yourself. It galded Martha a good deal when this matronly woman was Been pushing her way through the crowdL Without undignified excitement, but with a stern, set face which was much mora awful, she swooped down upon the unsuspecting Gunnar, grabbed him by the collar of his coat, shook him as If he had been a bag of straw and carried him off in disgrace. He strove in a half hearted way to exhibit a hilarity which he was far from feeling, and the foroed grin of mocking jollity which hs turned toward the disappointed spectators was rather pathetic than cheerful. It did not occur to him to make any resistance, however. He allowed himself to be dragged meekly as a lamb through the crowd in the hall into the stuffy sitting room, wnere tne foul air soon sobered his combative zeaL "Now," whispered his mother, giving him a little admonitory shake, "listen to the word of God and repent of your wickedness." The boy tried hard to listen and still harder t repent, but strive as he might his thought would revert to the fight. He regretted Utterly that it had been interrupted before he had triumphed over his enemy. He saw plainly now where he had neglected an opportunity to trip Thorsten up, and he wished he could have had the over again. The parson in the meanwhile was thundering away, threatening his parishioners with eternal damnation if they departed from the pure Lutheran faith or sent their children to the "godless" American schools. He was a young man of somewhat squatty figure, inclined to stoutness, with a fat flushed "And you—you"  "I seized it. Though considerably rattled I did not lose my presence of mind. Dropping down between the crosBpieces I swung clear with my feet and hung on with my hands. You can judge of a man's feelings with almost a hundred feet of space between his feet and a great mass of jagged rock." It was true that Gunnar's father had killed a man in Norway, and that had been the prime cause of his emigrating to the United States. He had scarcely been to blame, however, for the homicide, for Osmund Gait had attacked D»tn first, and he had to kill him in self defense. So the judge declared, though he was by no means favorably dispesed toward the defendant, and Wtn« Mattson was acquitted. It was, as usual, a girl that was at the bottom of the trouble, tor Hans and Osmund had been aspirants for the hand of "Wnrt.Vm. Vik, and she had preferred Hans. This was the harder to bear for Osmund, because his rival waa a harum-scarum sort of fellow who waa not even born in the valley, l»a/i therefore no right to cany off one at the prettiest girls before the noses of a dozen eligible natives. Well, the end of it, as I have said, was sad, and it seemed the sadder because Osmund, who was a widower, left two nhildran to lament his death. After his acquittal Hans bought a ticket for New York, and the story waa told {though some protended to doubt it) that Martha followed him to Christiania and met him on board the steamer when land was out of sight. She waa desperately in love wiui him, people said. However that may be, sure it waa that they were married by a Lutheran missionary in New York, and during the same spring took homestead land in Minnesota. But somehow Hans did not turn out as good a farmer as his wife had expected. He worked by fits and starts, but was more interested in learning English than in burning .stumps. Nearly every cent he had brought with him went for live stock and agricultural implements, and when, after a miserable summer in a dugout, a simple log house waa completed and sheds were built for the cattle they had to mortgage the farm in order to meet expenses. Then Ghmnar waa born, and things went straight for awhile-. Hans took hold of the farm work in good earnest and met the first payment on the mortgage, but then ho lapsed into meditation again, and his old restlessness got the upper hand. , And thus the poor drunken sot, with his bad teeth, frowsy head and dirty hands, would sit by the hour and with hysterical eloquence glory in the deeds of his ancestors. He was so proud of being a Norseman, though a drunk one, that he forgot all present misery in the sense of his historical grandeur. A Norseman drunk, he once declared, was a better fellow than a Deutschman or an Englishman or an American sober. "Along abont 1 o'clock, I should say, I was woke up by a sharp pain in my person, and with a shriek of agony which was heard distinctly by loyal neighbors of mine in Montreal, who said that it reminded them of the shriek made by Freedom at the time when Kosciusko fell, I stood in the middle of the floor wrapped in my own sad thoughts and an army shirt which did not extend to the close of the war by any means. "Great Scott! hang there?" How long did you "About ten minutes." "But did it take the train that long to pass over you?" "Oh, no." "Then how was it?" Gunn&r accepted this and other similar declarations in good faith, and never questioned his own superiority by virtue at his Norse blood to all the foreign babel that surrounded him. He heard continually the same story from the pastor and all the neighbors. Anecdotes were told at every social gathering illustrating the money greed of the Americana and their unscrupulous attempts to cheat the guileless immigrants. The settlement, which was now large and prosperous, had a sense of comfortable solidarity and compactness as a snug little Norway, safely hedged in and diked against the wild ocean of infidelity, strife and vice, which roared in vain against its defences. "As I darted away from what seemed to be the sting of an overgrown hornet, such as one might ran across while rambling through Satan's preserves, I saw in the uncertain light the retreating bit of a two-inch auger. Then I could make out dimly a large collection of auger holes distributed around over the floor, evidently in a vain search for spirits, and below I heard the footfall of escaping Boldiery as they fell over each other in their efforts to escape. "Why, the train side tracked at the other end, you see, and I hung on until one of the brakesmen walked out to me and said if I wasn't in the circus business to stay I'd better get out of that." * "What is your name, if I may ask?" inquired this dazzling individual, addressing himself to Gunnar. "Gunnar Matson." "But I dont exactly see." - "Oh, thefe is nothing to see. 1 got off the bridge all right, with three hours to spare before another train came along. I was very much obliged to the brakesman—very much. I might have hung there all day, you know."—New York Sun. "Whose son are you?" "I am the son of Hans Matson, but he's dead long ago." "Hans Matson? What year did he come to the United States?" "In 1864,1 think." "Exactly. 1 knew him. He came in the Cunarder Liberia." "The whisky was saved, and in one of the battles which occurred soon afterward I think it won us the day, for our colonel was so ill natured because of the head he had upon him on that day that before any one could pacify him he rushed in and killed quite a lot of the enemy, thus weakening them find turning their flank wrong side out, which we took advantage of, and it gave us the victory. An Unreasonable Customer. "I think he did. Mother has mentioned the name of that ship." "And he is dead, you say?" In a shop where birds are stuffed: "No, I am not at all satisfied. You stuffed my poor dear parrot scarcely a twelvemonth ago, and now all the feathers are coming off." "Yes." I remember when I wu a boy, which m erer so many more years ago than I Tailoring In Germany. CHAPTER HL "When did he die?" "About 1867 or 1868." Gunnar lived in this state of idyllio satisfaction until he was 17 years old. At least he tried hard to persuade himself that he was content. And yet there would be times when a sudden disgust would possess him, and the future that was in store for him would seem pitiful and mean. Though a half superstitious dread of the great world that surrounded him had been impressed upon him tram his earliest years, and stories of disaster consequent upon a desire to explore it had been dinned into his ears, he could not suppress a restless yearning to take the dangerous plunge, if only to test his skill as a swimmer. The great deeds of his ancestors, which Salveson had recounted to him in more or less distorted versions, had set his blood coursing at a rapider tempo, and vague visions of glory, gorgeous and unsubstantial like clouds at sunset, inflamed his imagination."Well, madam, yon should give us credit for the faithful manner in which we imitate nature. What bird did you ever see, no matter of what clime, that did not moult once a year?"—Judge. "alrona adventure alone. They »ur- wish It ww, it was customary to make the clothes of the family at hom&—seamstresses circulating through the neighborhood. A nan primitive bat asalsgoas custom now prevails in Germany. A tailor in each rural district travels from house to house, stops house long enough to cut ths men's (Mns and help the women folks to make them, receiving thirty cents a day and his board while he stays in the family. The arrival of the neighborhood tailor is an event. All the homespun, woolen it brought oat sad trousers and coats of most voluminous and rural effects are evolved. The seat of a pair of rustic pants shown on a German Sunday at the holiday makings "I beg your pardon, but there you are wrong, for I am pretty sure I met him in Chicago in 1871." Gunnar gave a start which came near upsetting his chair. He stared at Lawson with a perplexed, incredulous gaze. "But I have never been the same man since I was so horribly bored. I never feel sure of my victuals unless of the very coarsest character, and I suffer great pain at times. What I cannot understand is that so many people regard the whole matter as mirth provoking. Even quiet, sensible old people who are not at all frivolous give themselves up to paroxysms of laughter when I tell my sad tale. Why should old silver haired neonle whose bloom has been rubbed off for many a year let off a peal of laugnter because my pancreas is weather beaten and the night air whistles through my thoracic ducts? face and short stubby hands, covered on the backs with coarse brown hair. His * head too had a dense growth of the same adornment, parted on the left side, but a few tufts of rebellious hair stood straight up on the crown and at the parting. Though he had shaved in the morning the brown beard root was more than visible on his chin. His nose and mouth too had a touch of coarseness, and his whole appearance made the impression of a man in whom the old Adam was strong, though probably kept 111 proper discipline. "No doctrine has plunged more souls into hell, my brethren"—thus ran his Impassioned discourse—"than seductive saying, invented by the devil himself, that every man is saved by his own faith—that is, that any faith, whether false or true, has the power to save. Why then hart ye called ministers of the true faith—the pure and undiluted Lutheran instruct you here in your Babylonia exile, if Methodist or Baptist or unitarian doctrines Mrhaos miicht do iust si Wtil? I declare unto you, brethren in the Lord, you are a little faithful band of the elect in the midst of this land of Egyptian darkness, and unV?88 you hold together, stand by each other and the pure Lutheran faith, and hold aloof from all intercourse with the pestiferous sectoriee who infest the region round about us, ye will imperil your soul's salvation. Ye can no longer plead ignorance, for I have forewarned you in the name of the Lord. And be- EXPURGATING THK BOOK. here misalliance was made with the balloon feller, and if it should all get into our country paper my life would be an hell on earth." Welcome Home. "Are—are you sure of it?" he managed at last to stammer. Duchess of Borrowitz (to attendant)— Who knocks at the castle gate at this unseemly hour? "Cock sure; though 1 own he was much changed. His name—now what was his name? Blasted if I haven't forgotten it." Another man who is somewhat garrulous says: "There is a little incumbrance on my place of some $1,900 and interest from 1879 at 10 per cent. I hope to pay it as soon as I get my pension and arrears of same. In fact I would not have mortgaged but with the hope of raising the money long ago by that means. All mortgages are given, I think, with something in view which is expected to wipe out the indebtedness. That Is where we get disappointed and left, I think, do not you? Attendant (excitedly)—It is thy son. He brings with him an American wife with a purse large enough to pay all the family debts. "I wish you'd try to remember," the young man urged tremulously. Lawson ate on with a puzzled frown on his face, as if he was trying hard to recall the name. Duchess (with emotion)—Admit my son and the purse.—New York Weekly. is usually ample enough for the biggest giant that ever tumbled into German mf thology.—Lewiston Journal. Gunnar, his eyes dilated with eagerness, dropped his knife and fork and glanced anxiously at his mother, who was conducting a sober conversation on the prospects of the crops with a neighboring farmer. He Fills It with Charge*. "My latest beau ought to be satisfactory to you, papa." "Who is he?' . Sig. Chistoni has been Investigating the temperature oC mow at various depths. He hu found that the temperature of the uppermost layer is often considerably higher than that of the layer next the ground, the dlfferencesometimes amounting to tende- A Strong Cement. A cement which will adhere perfectly to glased surfaces, repair broken minerals, or in fact stick to anythlng.ls made by taking • two ounces of clear gum arable, one and a half ounces of fine starch, and half an ounoe of white sugar. Pulverize the gum arable, and dissolve it in as much water as the laundress would use for the quantity of the starch indicated. Dissolve the starch and sugar in the gum solution. Then cook the mixture in a vessel suspended iii - bolling water until the starch becomes dear. The cement should be as thick as tar, and kept so. It can be kept frCSm spoiling by dropping in a lump of gumi camphor or a little oil of cloves or sassafras.—Good Housekeeping. "I have put in all the testimony that anybody need to, I think, regarding the case, and have swore to everything that my attorney has besought me to swear to. For six months my right hand was in the air all the time, it seemed to me, and my neighbors all have been real good about swearing to things. I have changed works with some of them that way, swearing to their things, you see, where they was old comrades like, and they swearing to mine in return. IN THE NICK O' TIMS. four lodges, at night, and charged up to the fire, whereWhe savages were gathered round the bodies of six roasting horses. Two Indians were shot dead, and the rest, panic stricken by the sadden blow, and believing that the daring scouts had re-enforcements in hiding, ran away. Fifteen live horses with their packs were recovered, and the bodies of the Mexicans captured with them and slain, were found tud bu . id. On this trip Carson tod GodeyStYaveled 150 miles in thirty-four houreTand performed the daring and magnanimous service without other reward than the thanks of the distressed Mexicans He had an idea that if he could break away from his countrymen and aD Norse associations he had a fair chance of winning fame and fortune among the Americans. He broached the cautiously to his wife, who was so terrified at it that he repented of having spoken. She tried to m air ft Mm promise never to entertain such a preposterous plan. That he refused to do, however, but he grew moody and silent, tinkered at a model for an improved threshing machine which he had invented, and lost all interest in the farm. When this had gone on for a couple of years Martha concluded that his case was hopeless, and she changed her tactics and began te urge him to go. If that was the only way to secure his happiness she would no longer stand in his way. And so one day he took the model to pieces, and packed it, with some clean shirts and socks which Martha had made for him, into his knapsack, and started off for the nearest railway station, which was forty miles distant. That was the last Martha or her son had seen of him. Half a dozen letters arrived, to be sure, at long intervals during the first year of Us absence, but they told only of disappointments and privations. Martha wrote urging him to return, but there waa always something new to try, always some tempting prospect which bade him take heart and nA give up the battle. If this proved delusive he would acknowledge himself a failure, return to the Norse settlement, and hide his head in the chimney corner. It waa now twelye yean eiafie th&lMt "Mr. Kuhler, the ice dealer." "HI be parboiled if I can get hold of that name," ejaculated the grocer in pretended vexation. "It was rather a queer name. Probably it will occur to me one of these days, and then Til let you know." "Now I've got a good deal better claim for pension than a great many people that has got their papers through all right years ago, but when I present my claim foika seem to be pleased about something and go away, and that's the end of it. It was a peculiar case, but I "Why do you think a conscienceless ice dealer would be satisfactory to me?" But, on the other hand, there was his father's fate to deter him. He might have lived quietly and contentedly, as God had meant him to do, if he had not allowed himself to be lured by the temptation to gather riches and mafea himself great in the eyee of the world. That was what his mother had said when she told him of the troubles his father's restless ambition had caused her, and his scornful rejection of her prudent counsels. She strove now with all her might to draw the boy toward her, and the more, perhaps, because she divined in him the same spirit as that which had led her husband astray. She was not a soft woman who could speak glibly of her sentiments. But the dread, like an icy hand clutching at her heart, which took poesession of her at the thought of losing him revealed to her how deeply she loved him. She would have given much to have the language of affection readily on her tongue, but somehow it was denied her. And if, at this late day, she adopted caressing ways and endearing terms of address, she feared the resulting awkwardness both on bis part and on hers. The tone of intercourse between them had been established by long habit, and strive as she might she could not now alter it. "Because he fills the bill, papa."— Yenowine's News. OfTT A Polite Person. "I tell you, Mr. Jenks is a nice man." "So?" (TO BB CONTINUED ) Took Him at Hla Word. "Yes. I talked to him over an hour, and he agreed to everything I said and never interrupted me but once, and that was to say there was a bug on my dress collar, and even then he apologized."— Dansville Breeze. Slowpay (to collector)—I can't pay you today. Please call again. do not see anything so all-fired mirthful about it myself. "One man—I'll never forget his kindness to me—swore that he was at the anger when it struck me. He gave the date and everything, all the circumstances regarding the case, and said that after midnight they had invested some two thousand anger holes in the floor and extended them into the atmosphere above, when he waa called upon to act. He said he took the auger with a heavy heart, but made a last appeal, hoping to bore into the barrel and fill a washtnb which was held in place by two sad eyed boys, who had been whooping of it up the night before and so pined now for something to moisten their mouths, which, as they expressed it, had a flavor which reminded them of a basket of pups. "It was like this: In the fall of '63 1 was a kind of assistant commissary, and we had been on a forced march for two days trying to draw the attention of the enemv from the main column, and succeeding so well that we became very popular with the southern soldiery. We sent in our regrets and then lit out, but, land Bakes, they just seemed like they couldn't give us up, and so they didn't get off our coat tails for forty-eight hours. I haven't got my breath yet, to tell you the truth, but that ain't to the point exactly. Collector—This is very annoying. I don't want to do that. When Fremont reached the California coast on his last expedition, and with Commodore Stockton eaotured Los Angeles, Carson was sent overland toward tee states as bearer of dispatches to the government at Washington. He took the route through New Mexico, along the old Spanish trail, and was here met by Qen. S. W. Kearny, of the United States army, who with an escort of 100 men was on the way to California. Carson's dispatches were sent to Washington by other hands, and he turned about to guide Kearny to the Pacific coast. When the party reached the frontier of California, Stockton and Fremont, who were at San Diego, learned of Kearny's situation, and sent out a relief of forty men to open communications. Slowpay—Then stay away; but don't say that I didn't invite you.—West Shore. Merry, Though Moribund. Nearly Gave Herself Away. "To-he!" laughed the dying man. "It's the greatest joke on Bill." "I hate square dances," Baid Chappie. "So do I," said his fair friend. "Give me round dances and square mea—ah, by the way, are you going to the cotillon to-night?"—Epoch. "What is?" asked the doctor. "I was a-goin' to commit suicide today, anyhow, and Bill came along and murdered me—and, be-gosh, they'll hang him. Te-hel*—Louisville Courier Journal., r _ j t An Insect Landscape. The Persian entomologist, whose  don of insects attracted so much attention at the Paris exposition, is preparing a landscape, the subject being a water mill, a liver and # mountain, which will be cam-' posed wholly of insects. Four hundred, and fifty thousand night flying insects wilt form the foreground, the remainder of thar picture to be made up of 600,000 insect?,, composing w 8,000 ■pedes.—St; Louis Bepubllo ware lest, though ycra yourselves remain faithfal, your children go astray. Siren voioee of temptation besiege their hearts from all sides. Remember, yon will be :alled to account tar them on the last lay. The prospect of wealth, political Dfflce and influeswe and a high seat in be synagogues may lure them away !rom the simple faith and simple virtues Df their fathers. But 1 tell you ye have o choose between the kingdom of God md the kingdom of Mammon. Whal vill it pruiit you on the last day to bavC *"■ " * " ' sheriffs - "Does hanging diminish the number of murders?" It Don. "Finally the rebel horde, as they were called at that time, quit, and after shooting a few of us, enough for a mess, probably, they turned around and went back to monkey with the main column, which had improved the time by securing much needed rest and change of aoane. "Hypnotism is a great thing. I can hypnotize any one; and what I desire the subject to do he does." A Great Scheme. "I can't eay, but it certainly diminishes the number of murderers."—Boston Courier.With the united command of about 140 the general pushed on toward San Diego, and at San Bernardino attempted to surprise the Californians who were in arms against the United States. He was defeated, and he established his men on a hill of roeks, intending to m.-tkea stand until rslUtf game from Stockton. The California!)* ware in great strength, and were led of Qen. Don Andros Pico, brother of the governor of California. A party of memagn seat out by Kearny reached Stockton's camp with the news of his situation, baft en am tempting to return and reassure tuny of hone of succor thaw fell Into rain "He said he all at once heard a yell, which turned the hairspring in his watch perfectly white. Hp jerked the auger out, and, according to his sworn testimony, on the end it hail a fragment of an old anny shirt and a birthmark which he recognized, saying lo those about him, 'My Godt we have bored into the commissary's assistant; iet us begone without delay.' "See here, professor," said the little tailor, "TO give you 10 per cent, on all the collections you can hypnotize out of my customers."—Harper's Uazar. Accurate Information. Johnny Cumso—Papa, how big if a bird shot? Cumso—Jnst the same sice as before shooting, Johnny.—Judge. Electrical Music. Ths American Analyst tells that a Wash- I igton genius has invented an electric kQsical mac) The keyboard is similar D that of aa as i nary typewriter, and ite "The following day we camped near a deserted still, which had three barrels of nice, new, warm whisky in it. We captured these, and they were placed in charge of the commissary. The troops very much exhausted and begged for some of this liquor, bat it was explained to them by our colonel that the ■tuff was almost Bure death, and hgpflf been American 1 gislators 01 01 county cleric, or to have learned the English language, of which some are so foolishly proud? What will it profit you, I ask, in the 4gb* at him who debut truth Outwardly things were going along amoothly enough. The widow, by dint of tireless energy and skill, had worked up the farm until it fed them comfortably, and she had paid off the mortgage. Her chief concern now was to get Gun- Diur safely married, or at least engaged. A (Irc:»t ftrlieuitt. Doctor—What v™* ***** nef CK sir, is more outdoor exercise. Her Hair Was Red. ■s are conri-t, of electric -- le Press • ■:lui trically with a num■ beneath the •a each key closes the Dolly—Congratulate me, Godinl At last I can call Miss Roxy mine. Goslin—Be careful not to call her Catmine.—Yenowine's News. Economical Husband—Exactlv. I will put the washtub out in the backyard, and have an awning stretched over it.— Burlington Free Press. "After such testimony as this I thought I would only have to establish my own ;of an i. trio bell, and when the ire operated by an expert any tune, e played on I